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Now... I figured I'd open this up for discussion because lately I've been getting some flack from my roommate over just kissing guys on the first date. She claims it can be perceived as 'whorish' and that it can make you 'look like a slut.' However -- when I countered this argument with the idea that if 'I was a straight guy, it wouldn't be seen as whorish,' she turned around to tell me about her significant other and her having sex before they were even dating, which... defeats the point? Makes you whorish?
I'm kinda one of those people who don't much care what others think of me (I hold myself to my own standards.) And I'll be the first to admit that I've had random sex with guys I don't know (which can also be perceived as 'whorish,' but I don't really let it bother me much. I'm also a bit of the opinion that kissing isn't really that bad if you appreciate their company, etc.
I dunno. What do you all think?
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If its a kiss on the cheek, then its OK. If its a kiss on the lips, then keep in mind that you're giving him the ok to move forward into a relationship
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I figure a kiss is harmless, maybe giving the impression that you had a good time and I would like to see you again kind of clue
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I think you've solved this issue by stating that you pretty much don't care what others think of you. Kiss away, my friend, and be carefree!
But to actually answer your question, if the first date leads to kissing, don't you think there's a connection on at least some level. If you're whorish for it then so is the other guy. I had a crazy make out session on a first date with a guy once and that's as far as the relationship ever went. We both agreed it was fun, both went home and got ourselves off, and both agreed we probably weren't for each other but still say hello when we see each other to this day. I'm about as far from "whorish" as it gets. lol.
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Kissing on the first date is fine imo. I usually do....though i also make it clear that it is a green light for nothing aside from the kiss itself.
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Personally, I don't do kissing, hand holding, hugging on a first date.
Maybe a peck on the cheek to say goodnight...
But what do I know? I have only been with 8 men (sexually) - in 46 years of life. Only 2 were casual one night stands (my so called slut stage). And I'm only in a 14 year relationship.
Yes there were many 1st and second dates with lots of fellows. So many I can't recall them all. Attempts at finding relationship material.
I don't do promiscuity, I really don't like casual sex - I always tend to keep my eye on the long term commitment goal, not on tonight's festivities.
That is me. I have known all along in the dating scene what it is I want, what my goals are.
For the record, you roommate is wrong. Its not whorish, its sluttish - unless you ARE making money from sex....:tongue:
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