My sexuality is scaring me

[hank]

I just don't know how to become comfortable with it

[ceez]

It just takes time and a lot of patients

[hank]

I'm confused, are you trying to accept yourself or chose a political party? You are overthinking EVERYTHING, you can be the exact same person you were when you were in the closet, you ARE the exact same peron the only differnce is now everyone knows you like guys too. Don't stress yourself over what other people say, focus on you and your goals in life. I am a gay christian and I couldn't care less about what other people think about me. If you really want to meet other people like you then search online a little more, there is a website called meet.com for people looking for others like them, I've never tried it before but it looks legit.

Us lgbt folks are already just a small percentage of the population so finding some one with the same views as yourself is going to be hard but if you're determined then you will find what you are lookig for

(and I typed all that with no spell check :biggrin: )

No spell check, well done.

I don't know what the hell is going on with me. I kust feel so out of sync, but that is nothing new, I thought it was this but I am beginning to think something else is wrong.

I made the Christian and conservative point to express thay,, but got carried away.

[hank]

It just takes time and a lot of patients

How did you get through it

[hank]

I keep hesitating every time I want something

[ceez]

Well it was a little easier for me, when I was around 12 I had just found out what gay ment and I thought to myself "oh so thats what I am". I'm only officially out to one person but I know a lot of people I know suspect it. I never felt like I needed to change anything about myself so I didn't try, and I would love to play head games with anyone brave enough to attemp to change me. I did have some dark times when I wasn't happy that I am gay but that passed.

[hank]

It just takes time and a lot of patients

Well it was a little easier for me, when I was around 12 I had just found out what gay ment and I thought to myself "oh so thats what I am". I'm only officially out to one person but I know a lot of people I know suspect it. I never felt like I needed to change anything about myself so I didn't try, and I would love to play head games with anyone brave enough to attemp to change me. I did have some dark times when I wasn't happy that I am gay but that passed.

Nobody ever suspected me. They don't even believe me.

[archubbycub]

Hank you sound a lot like me. I started off my adult life as a Christian conservative (mainly because that's how my parents were), but the whole time I was dealing with my sexuality (or rather trying hard to suppress it) and thinking to myself, "You can't be gay! Look at all the things you stand for!"

I too was doing church work (Youth and Music Ministry, licensed Southern Baptist minister) thinking if I just do "God's work, then these other thoughts and feelings towards other guys will go away. But they didn't go away. In fact they got stronger. And that scared the crap out of me!

So then I met the woman who is now my wife and she kept talking about how she loved me and wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. She had a child from her first marriage, who I eventually adopted after we got married and a few years later we had a son of our own. And for all intents and purposes we were a happy family!

But all this time, I am still dealing with the fact that I am now a married man who finds himself attracted to (both physically and emotionally) to other men! And trust me, I did everything to convince myself that I was not gay, it was just a phase I was going through, and that it would pass.

Flash forward to today and through several years of unhappiness both in my marriage and in my life to where I finally came to grips with my sexuality. I am now a lot happier, even if I'm surrounded by friends and family who at best think I'm just making this up and at worst think they can " cure" me. I am free of trying to change who and what I am. Free from self inflicted guilt for feeling and thinking things I have no control over. Free to be me.

I say all that to tell you this. It get's better! Sure there a good days and bad days, but that's life. Stay true. To yourself and enjoy life. You only get one chance to be who you are!

[ceez]

They will once they see you put your tounge down another guys throat just give it time, those who love you will come around and the once that don't will reveal the monster behind the mask.

[hank]

Hank you sound a lot like me. I started off my adult life as a Christian conservative (mainly because that's how my parents were), but the whole time I was dealing with my sexuality (or rather trying hard to suppress it) and thinking to myself, "You can't be gay! Look at all the things you stand for!"

I too was doing church work (Youth and Music Ministry, licensed Southern Baptist minister) thinking if I just do "God's work, then these other thoughts and feelings towards other guys will go away. But they didn't go away. In fact they got stronger. And that scared the crap out of me!

So then I met the woman who is now my wife and she kept talking about how she loved me and wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. She had a child from her first marriage, who I eventually adopted after we got married and a few years later we had a son of our own. And for all intents and purposes we were a happy family!

But all this time, I am still dealing with the fact that I am now a married man who finds himself attracted to (both physically and emotionally) to other men! And trust me, I did everything to convince myself that I was not gay, it was just a phase I was going through, and that it would pass.

Flash forward to today and through several years of unhappiness both in my marriage and in my life to where I finally came to grips with my sexuality. I am now a lot happier, even if I'm surrounded by friends and family who at best think I'm just making this up and at worst think they can " cure" me. I am free of trying to change who and what I am. Free from self inflicted guilt for feeling and thinking things I have no control over. Free to be me.

I say all that to tell you this. It get's better! Sure there a good days and bad days, but that's life. Stay true. To yourself and enjoy life. You only get one chance to be who you are!

I don't work or even attend church regularly. I don't feel like my sexuality is a sin. I don't seek to change it any more. I am trying to accept myself, but not at the cost of everything else. I told a lady I was dating that I was bi, she called me a faggot, I am not gay, how I wish I was, or straight. I don't know what to do. You get burned enough you stop trying