Alright, so I am closeted. I am working as an assistant (I go wherever my boss goes). We are always on the road, and my boss has a personal driver, whom I think is hot.
Recently, the driver (50~60yo) has been nice to me more so than in the past. He has been talking to me more often, and has touched me at times. For example, he would ask me if I was cold, while rubbing and touching my hands and arms. The driver would also look at me from the rear-view mirror, and when I look back at him, he would look in another direction. And, whenever we talk face-to-face he is always smiling at me. I have tried asking him about his family, and he only told me he has kids, but never mentioned anything about his wife, or about his current status.
Last week, we were looking at each other quite a bit through the rear-view mirror. I fell asleep for 1-2 mins, and I woke up suddenly from an 'emergency stop' (the driver passed through the gate forgetting to pay the fee). He pulled to the side and ran back to pay it off, then the boss questioned him, while indicating he has never made this mistake before. Personally, I think it was an excuse, but he explained to the boss, he was thinking of which route to take to get back to the company. Then again, I may be thinking too much.
I will be moving back to my home country the end of this year, so I would like to approach him, because I could not get him off my mind.
I am unsure if he likes me or if he is even gay, can I get some advice on how I should approach him? Or do older gents always treat people this nicely?
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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We always treat people that nicely :dance3:
Usually because we were brought up to be nice to people, not something that happens much with the youth of today LoL.
But seriously, you said your not yet out. Would you have an issue if you were out? Because thats what usually happens when you hook up with someone from work.
Im a real believer in not mixing private and work life, as it can lead to complications later, especially if you have any kind of management power over the other person, and it sounds like you may have in this case (PA to the boss trumps a driver) However I also recognise that it does happen.
Im a little bit concerned that he seems to be making a move on you with the touching etc (in some circles that could be construed as sexual harassment) You should just think about what you would do if the attention becomes more forceful than you want. For example if your not objecting to whats occurring at the moment, he may take that as an invitation to pursue further.
Do you have any opportunity to socialise after work, even if its just a beer? Does he have a social networking site that you can look at? (Note - Yes even some of us OLDIES are pretty clued up on technology LoL)
Of course he may not be gay, and could just be striking up a conversation and showing an interest out of a completely innocent reason - like your both stuck in the same space for long periods of time!
P.S. Welcome to the GS Forum 
ObW
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You find that there are alot of nice older men out there, because they grew up in a time where people looked after one another, was considerate and so forth, sadly such values are lost in todays world
Though the closeness he seems to share with you seems deep, but im unsure as to whether it means more or not.
This would require you to step on egg shells, just carry on and see what other signs he gets, everyone gives off signs, it doesnt always mean they are into you or gay. for all you know you remind him of a close friend, son or something. my advice would be observe and maybe probe but be careful, dont ruin what could potentially be only a good friendship &^.^
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Hi,
I don't have any advice for you, but I like your post
And this...
underonesky Wrote:For example, he would ask me if I was cold, while rubbing and touching my hands and arms.
well, I only saw straight men behaving like that towards girls when they were flirting with them...
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OlderButWiser Wrote:We always treat people that nicely :dance3:
Usually because we were brought up to be nice to people, not something that happens much with the youth of today LoL.
But seriously, you said your not yet out. Would you have an issue if you were out? Because thats what usually happens when you hook up with someone from work.
Im a real believer in not mixing private and work life, as it can lead to complications later, especially if you have any kind of management power over the other person, and it sounds like you may have in this case (PA to the boss trumps a driver) However I also recognise that it does happen.
Im a little bit concerned that he seems to be making a move on you with the touching etc (in some circles that could be construed as sexual harassment) You should just think about what you would do if the attention becomes more forceful than you want. For example if your not objecting to whats occurring at the moment, he may take that as an invitation to pursue further.
Do you have any opportunity to socialise after work, even if its just a beer? Does he have a social networking site that you can look at? (Note - Yes even some of us OLDIES are pretty clued up on technology LoL)
Of course he may not be gay, and could just be striking up a conversation and showing an interest out of a completely innocent reason - like your both stuck in the same space for long periods of time!
P.S. Welcome to the GS Forum
ObW
x
Thanks for the reply. Personally, I've been really attracted to him ever since the first day I met him, so I guess him touching me was alright, at least there was some indication that he was trying to be a bit closer to me. Yes, because over the time the boss became a family-friend, so if I suddenly come out, I would be in big trouble.
There was no room for socializing after work, because he drives me home first before he drives the boss home. And, no I doubt he has any lol.
And, yes I am scared of the fact that he may not be gay and is just simply being really friendly with me.
Zennyboy Wrote:You find that there are alot of nice older men out there, because they grew up in a time where people looked after one another, was considerate and so forth, sadly such values are lost in todays world
Though the closeness he seems to share with you seems deep, but im unsure as to whether it means more or not.
This would require you to step on egg shells, just carry on and see what other signs he gets, everyone gives off signs, it doesnt always mean they are into you or gay. for all you know you remind him of a close friend, son or something. my advice would be observe and maybe probe but be careful, dont ruin what could potentially be only a good friendship &^.^
The fact that a lot of older guys just wants a piece of you in Canada, so I rarely see any older guys treating younger guys really friendly.
I am really urged to just ask him, but if he isn't gay then I think I just basically told him gay by asking him...
Is there some sort of question I can ask him that would maybe reveal or give some hints of his status or sexuality?
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advice please~
