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Give Bad Advice
Chop them off and they will stop feeling.

My tummy aches from too many french fries.
Reply

Keeping eating more until you develop a tolerance, and eventually a dependence.

I need to solve my butt problems
Reply

Easy solution NEVER and I mean NEVER trust the butt

I really should get some well needed sleep but the internet is to fasinating to me
Reply

Yes, never trust the butt, it'll drop you in the crap without warning :eek:

Become one with the force then the internet will galactically pale to insignificance

I still can't post pics. Andy has got my (second) message he responded but still no suck-Sess
(Sess is a guy) :frown:
Reply

Try paintings instead.

My fingernails need trimming... again.....
Reply

Use a lawn mower.

I need to go to sleep.
Reply

Go high tech, Go cryogenic

Why is that BAD?
Question: What are the practical applications of cryogenics today, and what potential improvements can we expect 20 to 30 years down the line? (Submitted by Sassan K. Darian)

Michio Kaku: Well Sassan, it's been the ambition of millionaires to have their heads, frozen in liquid nitrogen and at some point in the future. When we can cure many diseases, like cancer and things, we'll simply revive them. And in that sense of team a certain amount of immortality. Well, the devil is in the details.

First of all, if you suddenly freeze the human body, the problem is that ice crystals begin to form inside the cells. As the ice crystals expand, they rupture the cells. So in other words, freezing the human body seems to work only superficially, but if you look at the human tissue in the microscope, you find massive tearing and disruption of cell walls. Now, you may say to yourself, now wait a minute. Fish do it, right? Don't they simply get frozen solid in the wintertime? Frogs? Aren't they being able to thaw themselves out when it's springtime from a block of ice? And the answer is yes, but they do it with anti-freeze, that is glucose.

Here's how it works. You know, you put antifreeze inside your car, so even though outside, everything can be frozen solid, but inside your car liquids still flow normally and so your car still runs. In the same way, glucose is an antifreeze for frogs and certain fish that their bodies could still be in liquid form with blood circulating even though they are frozen solid on the outside.

Now, this doesn't mean that at some point in the future we might be able to create a natural kind of antifreeze for the body, however at the present time, the levels of glucose found in frogs and fish that enabled them to undergo suspended animation to kill a human being. So it would take genetic engineering. So I'm not saying it's impossible, I'm just saying that those organizations that advertise that you can live forever this way may be misleading the public because when the body is thawed out. What you have is dead tissue.

I need to find a wheelchair for a work colleague
Reply

Just try a rocking chair instead. Might not be as mobile, but they'll rock right to sleep Sleep

I need to get physical...physical.
Reply

Go to gym, get friendly with treadmill.
Treadmill has a sweaty sneaker fettish.
Get as physical as you want, for as long as you can stand it...:biggrin:

I need to sew on a button :frown: ther's a hell of a funny story there.....
Reply

Try sewing on the button only with your teeth


I am going to make something to eat
Reply



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