I am so confused

[LisaP]

Hi im Lisa and i dont know who to talk to about this. So a few months ago i went to a different country for an exchange and i met this girl and after a while i fell in love with her. i had never before fallen in love with a girl and i didnt know how to handle it. anyway she was straight and i had to go back home and i had a really hard time getting over her... after four months i went back for a week and saw her again and i was absolutely devastated when i saw how little she cared about me. but then for some reason i went back home without having feelings for her anymore.... and since then im kinda over her altough she will always kinda be my dream..
then i started watching the l word and OMG shane/kate is hooooooooootttt!!!!!!!!! she is just the most beautiful creature i have ever seen hahah
the thing is: i have never had a boyfriend( nor a girlfriend) before, and my friends do have that so i am scared that i just wanna be different to them, wanna have a reason for not having success with guys, im scared that i think im lesbian to hide it from myself that my friends all have awesome guys but me. i havent told anybody about me falling for a girl btw. all my friends think im totally straight.
i have kissed guys and the first time i ever kissed one i enjoyed it when he touched and gave his attention to me but since them i either found it disgusting or i didnt feel anything. i once kissed my best female friend to practice but it was just awkward.... she is totally straight btw.
and i also feel like i would never fall for any of my female friends.. before i fell in love with that girl i always liked guys and since then i am not interested in them.. but like macklemore is hot
so the weird thing is: i REALLY want to be a lesbian. i dont know why but id just love to have a girlfriend, presenting her to my friends, going through the trouble of being homosexual and fighting for rights. is that weird? i feel weird.

am i lesbian????? PLEASE HELP ME i am just so confused and wanna know what i love...

[pellaz]

you cant put other people's labels on your sexual preference. sure way to fail.

[Woollyhats]

It sounds like you have a degree of sexual attraction across the board. If you want, you could take the Kinsey test. I always score a 5/6 (exclusively homosexual). Just from what you've said, you'll probably score something like a 4 or 5. This test was great for my personally, since it allowed me to realise that people who are bi-sexual can lean one way or the other. Perhaps it will make you think of things as well.

http://vistriai.com/kinseyscaletest/

That's just to place yourself objectively. Another resource, my favourite one actually, is Wipe Out Homophobia. They explain each sexualiy in detail on their site!

I don't want to tell you who you are --- that's your job after all! But these recourses should help you with examining yourself .

http://stop-homophobia.com/

[Counselor]

I scored a 6. I guess I'm gayer than Kumawool. :tongue:

[Pix]

Sounds pretty lesbian to me the way you fantasize over being with a woman. And how you fell for that girl in the other country.

Just out of curiosity, how did you come across The L Word?

[LisaP]

i have been watching lots of youtube videos of lesbians and they mention that show quite often )

[LisaP]

i scored 3 in the kinsey test equally heterosexual and homosexual

[Woollyhats]

Hmm, I thought you would be leaning because of what you said, but I was wrong! This is exactly why it isn't my place to tell you what your sexuality is. If you read up on the sexualities on the stop homophobia site though, you should find the one that's you very easily, and I do have a feeling on which one you'll choose. I'm making you do it yourself though .

P.S.; some LGB persons decide to NOT label themselves. This is okay, but will make explaining your sexuality to others a tiny bit harder.

Best of luck .

[Rainbowmum]

Labels are for cans of food not people.
You are who you are, you like who you like. So what if you are different.

Don't be afraid , love has no preference and you are perfect just the way you are.

[BorneoJake]

Labels are for cans of food not people.
You are who you are, you like who you like. So what if you are different.

Don't be afraid , love has no preference and you are perfect just the way you are.

That is very true Rainbowmum. I couldn't agree with you more. Don't use a test or labels to find out who you are, follow your heart. I wasted a lot of time mind ****ing over stuff instead of just being me and thats all that matters =)

Listen to the dancing monkey!