I was thinking that it was time that we changed the terms Top/Bottom Active/Passive Dom/Sub
The language is so geared up towards make one a "champion" and the other a "loser" - i mean you can get much lower that Bottom! You can also be a passive top - or a really active bottom for instance.
To be honest there's nothing passive about taking a cock up your ass.
So thoughts guys - can we ever change our lexicon when it comes to sexual roles in the gay community?
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Wait, there's such a thing as a passive top? What, the guy just lies down calmly while the bottom does all the work? o.O
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yes, if the giver guy is laying down and the taker is on top, then you could argue that the bottom is doing the work - or riding it and the top could just lay there.
Also it doesn't have to actually be about the motion or action either - it could be the attitude also - because a bottom guy could really be driving the whole experience - that definitely doesn't make him passive...
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OP,
I just don't really use the words myself, as they aren't important to me. I have sexual fantasies about either or, but even then, the reason I don't care is for a completely different reason. In my personal life, I want to marry someone, and I'm so so so lucky that it's possible in my country. I don't want to have sex with a top or a bottom, I want to fall in love with someone, and I don't care what they are.
That's just the way I look at it. I know it doesn't help you with your opening question much... but if you don't like the terms, why not stop using them???
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I just find the choice of words for those who take - are within our community - belittling - or maybe thats just me?
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Its convenient descriptive language that is simple to understand. Why over complicate things?
I don't want to use a translator every time I'm talking to someone about their sexual preference.
"So you're a running fielder who stands out field? Well I guess I'm a walking pitcher who plays the bases, I think that makes us compatible, wanna hook up?"
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