A Guy Just Called Me A "Stage 5 Clinger"...

[MisterTinkles]

Doesn't matter if you use Grindr, Findr, Mandr, whateverdr.....

Its all the same. That's "the game".

They all bitch and whine about it when its done to them, then they turn around and do it to everybody else......and so on, and so on....

Its a never ending sick gag.


I guess its better than being called a Level 10 drama queen!!!

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Where? My dear Fella, if you look to the left of the post you will note it says SINGLE gay man....

I wouldn't be single if I knew where all the good guys were.

And I can't use past relationships and where I met those fellas either. Apparently I haven't actually met a nice fella - yet - hope spring eternal and all of that garbage....

And now a wink to throw you into a state of 'Was he for real, is he joking?'...

Spoiler:

Not joking - just jaded is all.

[MisterTinkles]

I wouldn't be single if I knew where all the good guys were.

[Aeneas]

I'm about as assertive as I can be and I still get shafted? How much clearer could my words have been? "If you are not interested in any relationship whatsoever be it sex, friends, or buddies I fully understand."

except you haven't been "as assertive as can be".


when you repeatedly told the guy you are "fine" with everything and anything (be it a one night thing, a relationship, whatever) you transmitted some serious insecurities there. and what were those "multiple questions" you asked i wonder? let me guess - "would you like to see me again?" "are you looking for just sex?" "have you dated anyone before / or from grindr?"

what you were really telling him is this: "i really dig you and hope you won't leave me for the next guy you find in grinder; because i am warning you, i am *fine* with everything so nothing you do will hurt me".


yep he believed you alright.

and then you texted him repeatedly.


you have got to understand that needy people (who feel "lonely and miserable") as in your case, get spotted as easily as the moon in a full moon night. you try to disguise it with denial (i.e.: i am fine with everything) except you repeated it so many times that it becomes completely the opposite. its like those school children who after a lie go into great depth and detail about what they "did" in the hopes that such elaboration will conceal their lie. except it doesn't - it makes it more obvious.

its OK - without your conscious knowing you are trying to build a defensive wall around you in case the worst happens. but confident people do NOT do this.

what should you have done? keep your mouth SHUT. you met for sex. you had sex. only time would have told you the answer to your question "will this grow into something else". you could have sent him a message three days later inviting him for coffee. see how that goes. but no. you had to make a point that you were *just* fine.



i come across these sort of posts in this site time and again... OH NO! what the hell happened to me!? most replies you will get here will tell you the other person is a lunatic, a moron for not appreciating you, and that this world needs more romantic people like yourself. but most of the time, its bollocks. people just don't know how to control their emotions which leads to the other party either losing respect or interest in you.

[Romann]

Well I can tell you with first-hand experience that relationships started over the internet wont work out 90% of the time. I had met someone and clicked almost instantly, we were involved for a little over half a year until I found out hes cheating on me, then another one that lasted around two weeks and he showed his real colors, aka complete a**hole. Of course I never met any of them in real life, both far-distance relationships. But anyways, if you meet the person over the internet, it WILL NOT work out.

[HomeagainNYC]

I'm sorry, but you might just be a stage 5 just for posting this........................................................ What do you think?????

[ZipZapZop]

Aww man, I hate people like that too. Don't give it more than a passing thought, guys who are that judgmental are likely stage 5 whores. I'd rather fuck a stage 5 clinger than a stage 5 whore.

The sex world is more teasing, more subtle, more strange. Before you text, imagine how you'd react if someone text you that. What would you think about someone if they text you multiple times? And when you text, ask yourself, is this a text that would turn me on if I received it? Don't be nice, be naughty. Getting laid is all about the adventure, that fear of exposing yourself and letting yourself be vulnerable to someone else, it's that feeling that makes your heart race! Embrace it. Let yourself love the other guy, no doubt his imperfections are greater than yours.