I think he meant the "Oh my God I can't believe you just said you find this movie character attractive when you're my boyfriend oh my God that's like semi-unfaithfulness" or the "Can you believe that these people are trying to tell ME what to do. After everything I've done for them seriously this is messed up we're not talking to them EVER again" kind of drama.
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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VileKyle Wrote:You must not know many smokers. It's an addiction. Nobody just quits cold-turkey. And to lose weight, it's about weaning yourself down. You don't just stop eating. So the comparison stands. It's also not like being gay at all. Sexual preference is something that is a part of you and cannot be cured. Obesity can be cured by changing your diet, and it is a positive thing to actually seek that cure. Sorry bro, but you aren't getting my sympathy on this one.
Ive known quite a few smokers actually...some can go cold turkey some need to be weaned off it. My grandpa smoked for years then he developed throat cancer and never smoked another on in his life after his diagnosis. My bf's sister on the other hand had to use gum and other nicotine patch things to help her get off them.
The point of that part of the post was that smoking is something you can give up completely unlike eating. Food is something you will most certainly die from if you dont partake in any of it.
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SolemnBoy Wrote:I think he meant the "Oh my God I can't believe you just said you find this movie character attractive when you're my boyfriend oh my God that's like semi-unfaithfulness" or the "Can you believe that these people are trying to tell ME what to do. After everything I've done for them seriously this is messed up we're not talking to them EVER again" kind of drama.
yes and my point was that sometimes "drama" is necessary to wake people up and help them to actually think about what they are saying and doing.
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KawaiiKitty Wrote:The point of that part of the post was that smoking is something you can give up completely unlike eating. Food is something you will most certainly die from if you dont partake in any of it.
You can, however, stop eating too many calories. I'm not telling anyone to stop eating. Just eat less.
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Dreamer Wrote:It's not being insensitive,
it's being honest,
and realistic.
For the majority of my life growing up,
I used to be a lard ass myself,
so actually,
IT IS a matter of simply changing one's diet
and exercise routine.
Sorry to burst your pity-party bubble.
And no,
telling someone to lose weight [SIZE="2"]
(something that IS possible!)
[/SIZE] is NOT equivalent to telling someone to change their sexual orientation [SIZE="2"]
(something that IS NOT possible!)[/SIZE].
Obese people don't need anyone to "just be honest" with them in that shitty, snarky way that reeks with judgement. They're quite aware they are obese.
To say that obesity is a turn off is fine, it is what it is. But their struggle is no one's business but their own. I used to be quite the lard ass as well, worked it off, almost 100 pounds. Being fat is fucking miserable for every second that you're fat.... which is every second you exist (as you well know). You never forget you're fat. No one lets you forget. And I certainly don't take the position that since I worked it off then that means I get to feel superior to those who haven't yet. That makes no sense to me. I understand the hopelessness of obesity and applaud those who can fight against it. But it is an immobilizing state and it is not easy or simple to believe you can truly lose it when you're trapped in a prison of a body, that yes, you "chose" ... I get it.
The reason people like to shit on fat people is because they are seen as unattractive to most. Don't wanna fuck 'em? Then they have no value.... unless of course the can do the Truffle Shuffle. Unattractiveness or physical deformity has always been linked to villainy and moral disgust (Richard III anyone?).
Everyone has issues and addictions. No one's perfect. Some people have serious gambling issues, drug addictions... some people are just cunts. Yet obese people are often the only group of people that others deem it acceptable to outright mock and shame in the guise that it's for their own good. This is simply a transparent excuse to be mean to someone and get away with it without the guilt.
Touting personal responsibility is just a way to avoid an attempt at empathy.
Again, I'm not criticizing anyone who says they're not attracted to fat people, but to go around calling them "yucky" or whatever and saying you're just being honest is simply cruel and unnecessary.
Hmmm, in fact, I think I just found the answer the original question of this thread.
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KawaiiKitty Wrote:i wonder how most people here would feel if they were out on the street with their SO of the same sex and they were holding hands someone came up to them and said, "yuck!" I think they would be alittle bit more than offended to say the least.
Not happened to me ever and my current partner holds my hand through town and all sorts of places. We've had staring but nothing more then that.
VileKyle Wrote:You must not know many smokers. It's an addiction. Nobody just quits cold-turkey. And to lose weight, it's about weaning yourself down. You don't just stop eating. So the comparison stands. It's also not like being gay at all. Sexual preference is something that is a part of you and cannot be cured. Obesity can be cured by changing your diet, and it is a positive thing to actually seek that cure. Sorry bro, but you aren't getting my sympathy on this one.
People do give up smoking cold turkey, both my Sister and Granddad did so without any aides or other help. I will agree on the food thing though about people weaning themselves off of large portions.
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@Wade
It is not true to say that most people have issues and addictions. Most people don't. They live normal lives, looking after their family and holding down a proper job or whatever they want to do. Most people are not drug addicts or gamblers or alcolohics or murderers or obese. Those are exceptions.
People need to take responsibilty for their actions, and if they fit into any of those categories they need to seek help and resolve the problem. Accepting that it's really OK for them to be like that, and that they're not responsible for it, just gives them an excuse not to kick the habit.
And don't forget the point I made earlier, that people in all those categories, and others no doubt, cost the average person a whole lot in trouble and taxes. Maybe it's time that people with self-inflicted problems paid for their own treatment.
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Dreamer Wrote:It's not being insensitive,
it's being honest,
and realistic.
For the majority of my life growing up,
I used to be a lard ass myself,
so actually,
IT IS a matter of simply changing one's diet
and exercise routine.
Sorry to burst your pity-party bubble.
And no,
telling someone to lose weight [SIZE="2"]
(something that IS possible!)
[/SIZE] is NOT equivalent to telling someone to change their sexual orientation [SIZE="2"]
(something that IS NOT possible!)[/SIZE].
As you become older, it becomes much more difficult to lose weight.
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Spellbound Wrote:@Wade
It is not true to say that most people have issues and addictions. Most people don't. They live normal lives, looking after their family and holding down a proper job or whatever they want to do. Most people are not drug addicts or gamblers or alcolohics or murderers or obese. Those are exceptions.
People need to take responsibilty for their actions, and if they fit into any of those categories they need to seek help and resolve the problem. Accepting that it's really OK for them to be like that, and that they're not responsible for it, just gives them an excuse not to kick the habit.
And don't forget the point I made earlier, that people in all those categories, and others no doubt, cost the average person a whole lot in trouble and taxes. Maybe it's time that people with self-inflicted problems paid for their own treatment.
Nobody "needs" to do anything in order to please you or anyone else, and that includes not wearing tight bicycle shorts. That's your issue, not theirs. I'm glad to know that you've led a life that others can look up to as beacon of hope and what a truly perfect existence of restraint and responsibility can do. May you inspire all those you encounter to better themselves sir, and if you should fail, it clearly wouldn't be due to a lack of trying (though not too long ago "homosexual" would've fit nicely in that list of undesirables you included. Not that that has anything to do with the point I'm making... but I thought it was worth a mention).
Though my point was that some people should attempt empathy. Empathy is hard. It means trying to understand other people's plights even if you yourself have not struggled with such a matter. It's a good thing, I promise.
And you mentioned personal responsibility again, and I agree with you. It is about personal responsibility, particular the "personal" part. That means it's not about you. And if the only way you can evaluate the worth of your fellow human is by the drain on your wallet (the ol' "Gimme it it's mine" philosophy), then I do pity you sir. What a unfortunate way to live.
Though this has given me a great idea for a new superhero.... Personal Responsibility Man!
Mother: "Personal Responsibility Man, thank goodness you're here. My son is trapped in the well."
Personal Responsibility Man: "Then he shouldn't have been playing so close to it then, should he? And you should've been a more responsible parent and kept a closer watch on him. My job is done here. Up, up and away!"
Mother: "Oh Personal Responsibility Man, you're so smug and unhelpful! What a dick."
I simply will never understand why some adults enjoy being mean. And that's all this is. It perplexes me every time I see it in real life and on.... whatever all this is. Just adult bullies.
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@Wade
Your example of the well is a very good one. The parents should not have let him play there without supervision. If he dies, they're responsible for his death. You've made my point perfectly.
There is plenty of advice and help for people. In the UK there are the Health and Safety people who will advise you on putting a fence around wells to stop kids falling in. They will makes businesses check their premises to ensure the risks are identified.
Empathy is useless unless people are prepared to take control of their lives. If they are, there are plenty of services who will help, along with family and friends, hopefully.
It's nothing to do with being mean. Adults should behave like adults, not 2 year olds.
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What turns you off?
