What turns you off?

[Spellbound]

You've just identified the problem. If obese people can understand that they have emotional or other difficullties, then they can try and solve them. Just holding up your hands and saying, that's the way it is, doesn't cut it.

[megumidesu]

You are telling them to lie to themselves and tell themselves that being skinny is the way they should look instead of what they feel is comfortable within themselves.

if the way someone feels comfortable is extremely unhealthy and almost definitely going to lead to an early death i don't think it's okay . part of why many people aren't attracted to obese people is because of how unhealthy it is

[SolemnBoy]

A list of true statements regarding the quarrel in this thread.

1. Obesity is unhealthy.
2. Obese people are no less deserving of respect and fair treatment than others.
3. Losing weight can be really hard, some people have genetic disadvantages, but it's never impossible.
4. Not being attracted to a special body type is not insensitive.
5. Some comments against obese people have been too harsh but they do not signify a popular opinion in "the gay community".
6. Factors you can't control may influence your obesity but you can't BLAME anyone but yourself.
7. Finding the motivation to lose weight can be hard as fuck and nobody should be told they're lazy because they're fat.

[KawaiiKitty]

if the way someone feels comfortable is extremely unhealthy and almost definitely going to lead to an early death i don't think it's okay . part of why many people aren't attracted to obese people is because of how unhealthy it is

well no Im not saying that its ok either. What I am saying is that they have to deal with the emotional issues FIRST before the diet and exercising will work. You cant just tell someone, "oh well go diet and exercise you fat pig. Its easy to lose weight!" and like overnight they will become skinny. Thats how some people on this thread seems like they think it works. Its not something you insensitively and flippantly go "yuck!" at and walk away either. There is a huge emotional and mental process that alot of obese people need to go through in order for weight loss to work for them.

i wonder how most people here would feel if they were out on the street with their SO of the same sex and they were holding hands someone came up to them and said, "yuck!" I think they would be alittle bit more than offended to say the least. Its the same insensitivity that keeps fostering homophobia and bigotry against obese people and all kinds other forms of hate. Its because good people dont stand up and say that its wrong to judge someone just by one physical quality that they have little to no control over.

[megumidesu]

i wonder how most people here would feel if they were out on the street with their SO of the same sex and they were holding hands someone came up to them and said, "yuck!"

i used to get that a lot , actually . but not for being gay or obese . i'd get it for being too thin

[Spellbound]

@KK

I already said, if you have emotional or other problems, then address them. Just saying it's too difficult doesn't work.

[KawaiiKitty]

i used to get that a lot , actually . but not for being gay or obese . i'd get it for being too thin

Exactly! and Im sure it did wonders for your already fragile self image, right?

Its the same way with obese people. No matter how big or how small theyre still people with real feelings who dont deserve to be made fun of.

[Tim18]

Too, much drama is what turns me off the most.

[KawaiiKitty]

lol if it hadnt been for "drama" caused by a few gays years ago at stonewall you wouldnt be as free to talk about being gay as much as we do here today.

[VileKyle]

thats really not a good comparison either since with smoking you can quit cold turkey. You MUST eat food to live its not something you can give up completely. Even comparing it to being gay you could give that up completely by not ever having any kind of relationship ever again but you still need food to survive. Hurling any insult at someone in a predicament that they can hardly change is very insensitive to say the least.

You must not know many smokers. It's an addiction. Nobody just quits cold-turkey. And to lose weight, it's about weaning yourself down. You don't just stop eating. So the comparison stands. It's also not like being gay at all. Sexual preference is something that is a part of you and cannot be cured. Obesity can be cured by changing your diet, and it is a positive thing to actually seek that cure. Sorry bro, but you aren't getting my sympathy on this one.