Risks of unprotected sex with men then unprotected with trusted girl.

[paradis]

Hi beautiful people. Hope all is well. I needed some health/safe sex advice.

I am a neo bisexual man and passive with men (and its great ). So far I have practised safe sex with 6 different men and been active to another men, always safe sex, except some minimal naked tip-anal rubbing and unsafe oral sex (without ejac.)

Last time I tested I had no health issues but haven't tested since starting sexual relationships men.

Now, I am about to sleep with another girl I know and don't want to use a condom. Let us assume she is very healthy and trustworthy.
If I don't get tested, do you think my anal safe sex as passive with other men would still pose a health risk to her?

Also, I am still paranoid that anal safe sex will still but me at risk. Should I relax and not be concerned as long as it is safe?

Thank you, this issue is important to me.

[LateBloomer]

Ha.

Look.

The only SAFE sex is no sex.

The definition of "safe" is "freedom from risk."

Anytime two people are so close to each other (INSIDE of each other) there is risk of SOMETHING.

Condoms provide only a very basic level of protection. Yes, condoms (usually) do a good job at containing semen. They also provide a barrier between skin on skin, but that is a very localized area.

One STD you're exposing yourself to with tip on anus rubbing is HPV--search these forums, there's been several threads. But that one (HPV) is undetectable for men and incurable.

So, no one in their right mind is gonna tell you what you're doing is "safe". It's simply not. Your use of "protection" and "safe sex" practices will MITIGATE some risks, but not all.

Use your best judgment.
Good luck.

[Edward]

Have safe sex always, especially if you've had multiple various partners. You can do what you want with your own health, but you have no right to risk with other person's health, like this girl you want to have unprotected sex with.

[Vigilias]

Hi Paradis.

You asked "... I am about to sleep with another girl I know and don't want to use a condom. Let us assume she is very healthy and trustworthy.
If I don't get tested, do you think my anal safe sex as passive with other men would still pose a health risk to her?"

HIV, the virus which leads to AIDS can be transmitted by having unprotected penetrative vaginal or anal intercourse with a HIV+ partner. Also from sharing unsterilised or improperly cleaned drug injection equipment with a HIV+ person (including needles, syringes, filters, spoons and other water vessels.), or from a mother to her baby during pregnancy when HIV crosses the placenta or during delivery when blood or cervical secretions come in to contact with the infant.

Condoms are an effective barrier to HIV and other sexually transmitted infections.

Being penetrated by a HIV+ partner ANALLY/VAGINALLY is regarded as a HIGH RISK. Penetrating a HIV+ partner anally or vaginally or recieving unprotected oral sex is regarded as a SMALL BUT REAL risk. Inserting the penis in to the mouth of a HIV+ partner is regarded as a THEORETICAL risk only - there have been no reported cases of HIV transmission in this way.

"Also, I am still paranoid that anal safe sex will still put me at risk. Should I relax and not be concerned as long as it is safe?"

Again, condoms are an effective barrier against HIV.

Paradis, I'm about to get a little technical here, but HIV transmission depends a lot on the infected partners CD4 cell count and their Viral Load. Anyone who has had a positive diagnosis will be monitoring their health regularly and anti HIV drugs can dramatically reduce that persons viral load to undetectable levels.

It's a while since I worked in the sexual health field but you can get up to date information from the Avert website. http://www.avert.org/

Have fun and play safe!

[MisterTinkles]

Theres that word again........"sex".....

I must find out what this is.

[Tyrion]

The way I see it, you should NOT have unprotected sex with this woman, and she should not let you have unprotected sex with her. It's always better to play it safe (unless you're trying to make a baby with someone.. but who the hell would want to do that? )..

[Counselor]

I am a neo bisexual man

pls asplain kthxbai

[Geminize]

It's unfortunate that the phrase "safe sex" has come to mean using a condom during penetration. As LateBloomer said, the only safe sex is no sex. Condoms help reduce risk, but they don't make sex safe. "Reduced-risk sex" just isn't as catchy a phrase somehow.

HPV is transferred skin to skin, and it doesn't have to be genital skin. Anyone (male of female) can carry that virus without showing symptoms. The more people you have intimate physical contact with, the more at risk you are along with all your future contacts.

You want us to assume this girl you're going to shag is healthy and trustworthy. Have you been trustworthy with her? Have you told her you are actively bi? You can't even tell her how healthy you are because you don't know. GET TESTED!!! As active as you report to be, I would be getting tested every 3-4 months.

[Dreamer]

....Use condoms for penetration,
and oral if she goes down on you.
Use dental dams if you're going down on her.
Female condoms are better,
penetration wise,
and safer than regular condoms.
Use plenty of water-based lube,
to avoid a condom from breaking.

Don't have unprotected sex, EVER!

No matter how much you trust a person or vice-versa...
it's not a bout trust...
it's about staying healthy,
and having respect for yourself,
and others.

[Beau]

Do you believe that couples married for 20 years should still be wearing protection? Should all couples be artificially inseminated when they choose to have a child?

If we are talking about a one night stand or even a short term relationship I am all for safe sex. However, a committed couple should have a bit more trust in their relationship.