Just friends huh? What's his DEAL?!

[zakattack]

I met this guy nearly two months ago and we started hanging out.
I was just looking for friends, because my past relationships have been nerve wracking and the guys were total jerks. This boy told me he wanted a relationship, but we could just be friends since that's what I wanted. As I continued talking to him I discovered we have a crazy amount in common and we have led very similar lives. We stayed out talking until 6 am and we could have just kept talking. We hung out on Sunday for two weeks. He lives an hour away so I don't see him as much as i would like.The second time we hung out he kept wanting to cuddle with me and he even held my hand. We even kissed. The minute I would get home after seeing him he continued talking to me through text. We have talked EVERY SINGLE DAY since the first we hung out. I really feel like I've fallen for him. I've expressed my feelings toward him and told him how I felt, but now he just wants to be friends and he does not want a relationship. Why the sudden change? He said that he and I might could be together someday, a chance of it. He is a very dense individual. If we are having a flirtatious conversation and you tell him he's being flirty, he will not understand.
Every weekend for the past 4 weeks he has had some excuse as to why we couldn't hang out, all legitimate reasons. I still feel like he's just trying to avoid me.
He even proceeded to tell me that another guy has asked him out.
He knows how I feel about him. This is his dense side showing.Why would he tell me that?
That basically shows that "I'm not looking for a relationship" really meant "I don't want a relationship WITH YOU."
What is his deal?
Is he just too nice to tell me he doesn't want to date me?
Do you think he's trying to avoid me?
What do you guys think about this situation?
I'm just frustrated here.

[JimmyDalton]

I think he's found someone knew. Maybe his feeling for you has faded away. I'm sorry.

[Merc]

Zak, That is definitely a frustrating situation and I think we've all been through it at one time or another. It really just sounds like he doesn't know what he wants right now. I would let it go for now because otherwise you will probably continue to feel shutout.

[jimcrackcorn]

I'd be frustrated too if I were in your shoes.

It sounds like he got your hopes up, and then backed off without giving you a reason. You can try to pry an answer out of him, but he will probably continue to avoid giving you an explanation for his sudden change of heart.

At any rate,,,,, he said that he was only interested in a friendship for now,, so you need to accept that this relationship isn't going any further, and move on.

Don't give up hope, there's a lot of great guys out there just waiting to meet you.

Good luck,
Jim

[Vigilias]

This dense side of him, comes in handy for him doesn't it!?

I think he knows EXACTLY what he's doing and what you mean - every word, every action.

He plays stupid to prolong his enjoyment of a situation, to observe your reaction and to draw more emotion from you. He's an emotional vampire, a player... a Vamplayer, if you will.

Tell me, have you began to feel like a stalker yet? Oh he'd looooooooooooove that!

As you can see, my opinion of him is low, lower than a worms tit.

Cut him loose and let him play his silly games with someone else. He'll wake up one day to a very lonely world.

[Ryocchi]

I think you should stop contact with him, don't initiate anything, if he speaks answer but don't hurt yourself anymore, you already told him how you feel and dense or not it was a low blow telling you someone else asked him out, you might have told him at first you only wanted to be friends but it's totally valid and human to change your mind and decide you can't be friends with him, if he notices you are not seeking him anymore and calls you, you can then decide wether you want to continue seeing what's up ith him or dump him, if he doesn't contact you anymore, file him up as another experience and go dance and hang out with your friends.

[NerdyGiant23]

Yeah, having a guy you like think of you as a friend after stuff like that hurts. I once fell for a guy and he seemingly fell for me because we had the same interests and were attracted to each other, but he suddenly ended things. He wanted to be friends and I asked him to give me time to think about it.

After a week I told him I needed him to answer questions before I could consider being his friend (I just wanted answers, I knew I wouldn't be his friend). Found out the reason he ended things is that he ended up reconnecting with an ex and was actually back together with him while with me.

While it hurts to see someone you like walk away, you'll eventually find that one that can love you and stick by your side.

[justbry87]

A few people already touched on it, but..

I remember having be in a similar situation as you. And
all you can do is distance yourself from those types of
people.

These types of people don't want a relationship. They build you
up, so you can give them your full attention. Then once they've
'used' you up and you're ready to finally talk about relationships
they'll easily drop you, give you a lame excuse like nothing
ever happened.

This to will pass and you'll be a better person in the end.
Good luck~

[zakattack]

In his defense, he actually is a rather dense person.
He is the type of guy you cant tell a joke to because he figured out the punchline.
I always have to be direct with him and I like that. He keeps me from beating around the bush.
Yesterday I didn't message him at all. Last night I got a message from him asking if I was alive. Like I said we talk every single day. We chatted for a bit and I was being a little flirty. I asked him who the guy he dated was. He said he was watching a movie with him as we spoke. HE WAS TEXTING ME WHILE HE WAS ACTUALLY ON THE FUCKING DATE. WTF!? I asked if he liked him and asked if he was second date worthy and he said yes to both of those. I couldn't stand it. I told him exactly how I felt about him. I haven't heard a response back.

[Ryocchi]

Forget. about. him.

Don't hurt yourself anymore please.