I agree with you Smurlos in that the term "love" is often given bad press or bad connotations - my best mates know I love them, but only one of them can deal with HEARING it, which always makes me cringe - like drinking milk after eating a mint ... it's like ... WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL !?!?!
However in answer to your actual question, I think it's more about making the person feel loved than how you achieve that ... I've never felt so loved as when I'm given a random cuddle ... or when I'm lying on the couch with a lil blankey in the wintertime asleep, and having that vague recollection that somebody came to adjust it so it better covered me to prevent a chill - stuff like that ...
... the slightest gesture can mean the world to somebody, and anything that is DEMONSTRATIVE of your love for somebody, be it actually saying "I love you" or doing something big or small that shows it, cannot be a bad thing if it's done once, once a day, or more often ...
... as long as you're not overdoing it - by like ... constantly saying it all the time or (God forbid) bringing superlatives into it ... I love you the most in the entire world ... no I love YOU the most ... YOU CAN'T because I love YOU the mostest, and so on, then I think you're going to be juuuuuuust fine ...
... and knowing you as well as I do, I know you'll be sound - you've a VERY level head on your young shoulders my dear.
xXxXx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
P.s. Love ya ... hehe xx
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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Shadow Wrote:P.s. Love ya ... hehe xx
No, really!!! That's a bit OTT! (lol)... hehe. Shadz we love you too.
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Shadow Wrote:I agree with you Smurlos in that the term "love" is often given bad press or bad connotations - my best mates know I love them, but only one of them can deal with HEARING it, which always makes me cringe - like drinking milk after eating a mint ... it's like ... WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL !?!?!
However in answer to your actual question, I think it's more about making the person feel loved than how you achieve that ... I've never felt so loved as when I'm given a random cuddle ... or when I'm lying on the couch with a lil blankey in the wintertime asleep, and having that vague recollection that somebody came to adjust it so it better covered me to prevent a chill - stuff like that ...
... the slightest gesture can mean the world to somebody, and anything that is DEMONSTRATIVE of your love for somebody, be it actually saying "I love you" or doing something big or small that shows it, cannot be a bad thing if it's done once, once a day, or more often ...
... as long as you're not overdoing it - by like ... constantly saying it all the time or (God forbid) bringing superlatives into it ... I love you the most in the entire world ... no I love YOU the most ... YOU CAN'T because I love YOU the mostest, and so on, then I think you're going to be juuuuuuust fine ...
... and knowing you as well as I do, I know you'll be sound - you've a VERY level head on your young shoulders my dear.
xXxXx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
P.s. Love ya ... hehe xx
perfectly said Shadow... that is why we have been missing ya.
love ya all.
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Awwwwwww thanks babes  .
xx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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Shadow Wrote:I agree with you Smurlos in that the term "love" is often given bad press or bad connotations - my best mates know I love them, but only one of them can deal with HEARING it, which always makes me cringe - like drinking milk after eating a mint ... it's like ... WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL !?!?!
However in answer to your actual question, I think it's more about making the person feel loved than how you achieve that ... I've never felt so loved as when I'm given a random cuddle ... or when I'm lying on the couch with a lil blankey in the wintertime asleep, and having that vague recollection that somebody came to adjust it so it better covered me to prevent a chill - stuff like that ...
... the slightest gesture can mean the world to somebody, and anything that is DEMONSTRATIVE of your love for somebody, be it actually saying "I love you" or doing something big or small that shows it, cannot be a bad thing if it's done once, once a day, or more often ...
... as long as you're not overdoing it - by like ... constantly saying it all the time or (God forbid) bringing superlatives into it ... I love you the most in the entire world ... no I love YOU the most ... YOU CAN'T because I love YOU the mostest, and so on, then I think you're going to be juuuuuuust fine ...
... and knowing you as well as I do, I know you'll be sound - you've a VERY level head on your young shoulders my dear.
xXxXx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
P.s. Love ya ... hehe xx
Welcome back *big hugs* Have missed ya loads!! :biggrin:
The idea of someone coming up and adjusting the blanket gives me a warm glow inside awwwwww how cute!! When I was at alton towers at the weekend I fell back asleep while Ian was in the shower. When he came out, he came and laid on the bed next to me wrapped his arms round me and was tickling my arm and was kissing down my neck. It was a really nice feeling to wake up to. But stuff like that reminds me of your blanket thing  mile:
LOL at the superlative thing!!!  We'll sometimes (but VERY occasionally) text back "love you more" - but it never goes any further than that haha. Like further arguing...!!
But yes I completely agree. Love is a lot more than just a word, it is a feeling that needs to be demonstrated - and a bit like a fine wine, can be appreciated in large doses or small doses just as much. So many things come into play. I agree in part with what you say Wilem about the attraction and the need for procreation etc. being programmed into the genes, but you can procreate without loving... i.e. people that have one night stands etc. The act of loving encompasses sex and attraction as they're obviously important - I see them as structural supports i.e. things that help to keep the relationship together, but it isn't limited to that, the act of loving for me is based on so many things.
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Thanks hun ! I missed you too :frown: mile:  xx
Y'know that could be the start of a fantastic quote - something like ...
"Love is like a fine fine - it can be appreciated in varying quantities, but too much can intoxicate you" or something like that :biggrin:.
Obviously it would need a little refining as a quote, but I think it's a really powerful comparison !! :biggrin:.
Hope you're feeling better soon baby
xXxXx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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Is it appropriate to tell your friends that you love them?I'm talking about a friend that you just recently met.Should I have not told him?I think I made him uncomfortable and although he acts like it's okay,I know I shouldn't have.
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I personally don't see anything wrong with telling the people I love that I love them ... but I draw a mental distinction between loving somebody and being in love with somebody, and that's something that a lot of people don't perceive ...
I love you Dan, but I'm not in love with you. I love you because you're my friend, and I care about you and your wellbeing.
I love Smurlos, Michael, PA, Marshlander, Wouldlikemuscle, Twazzle, Spotysocks and loads more people, because they are in my heart and my thoughts and prayers ...
... but I'm not in love with any of them ...
I think that sometimes when you say "I love you" to somebody, they assume you mean you're in love with them, and THAT is where the pressure stems from, because you can love somebody and have it be no more than that - as in there's no pressure, there's no need to commit or behave differently or anything - it's just a demonstration of your openness and comfort with your feelings.
It's when people think something is expected of them, or that they are burdened by somebody being IN love with them that they start to bawk and panic and feel trapped ...
... so perhaps your friend just needs that explaining to him a bit.
That's how I've always perceived it at any rate ... hope that helps babe xx
!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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Shadow Wrote:I love Smurlos, Michael, PA, Marshlander, Wouldlikemuscle, Twazzle, Spotysocks and loads more people, because they are in my heart and my thoughts and prayers ...
... but I'm not in love with any of them ...
:eek: *SLAPS* OMG!! Thats not what you told me last night when.... :eek: OH MY, you can sleep on the couch tonight!!! 
:biggrin: teehee! mwah xxxx love you too :biggrin:
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Thanks for that clarification Shadow.I know I'm not in love with him but at first,he did take it like that then I had to clarify it.Even I feel weird about saying it.Besides him,there are only a few men that I have told that I love them (mostly family).I think that as males,we aren't raised in that culture where we are open to talk about our feelings and those involved.So I guess it's just one of those things...Wise words indeed Shadow,missed them!
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