Confused completely by him

[missourigaymer]

Well, hi everyone. I have a situation I was recently in and can't really understand it. So bear with me.

My brother brought a friend over to hang out. I thought nothing of it. I decided to go hang out with my bro. Now my brother is a jokester and his friend likes to joke too. While we were just talking, I sat next to my brother's friend. There were few seats so of course I wasn;t going to stand up the whole time. the convo started out ok. His friend said he was straight and comfortable with his sexuality. I was ok with that and actually said that was really cool. He said he likes to have friends that make people question his sexuality. I didn't understand that comment. The convo went pretty normal. He asked about when I came out, I told him. Eventually my bro brought up the last person I'd been with and his friend seemed upset, not about the subject matter, but the person mentioned. A little later in the evening the jokes began. At first, he would try to touch me and I would wig out. My natural reaction to strangers trying to touch me. This seemed to egg him on. I decided two could play this game and so I decided to go with it. When I touched him he laughed. I thought that would be the end of it, due to the fact I showed no fear and let him know that I wasn't interested. shortly after he ecame more suggestive in the jokes. For one, he pulled my hair. When he did, he pulled me by my hair towards him. It really hurt, and I told him to stop, as did my bro. His answer was that I liked it. Obviously I didn't or I wouldn't have said ow and stop. he continued in a vulgar and suggestive manner. Including reaching for a sensitive area, asking to play the nervous game, trying to get me to "look", and making suggestive comments. I left, yet the next day, when I figured he'd drop it, he didn't. What's going on? I don't understand his attitude. Any advice would be appreciated and sorry this took so long. I was hoping to get in as many details as possible without being vulgar myself.

[LateBloomer]

Hi.

Your brother's friend sounds like a pretty insensitive jerk who gets off by making other people uncomfortable.

He was probably a bully in school, which means (statistically) he got pushed around by someone else in the past. That's why it feels good to him to pull your hair.

Just my opinion. I could be totally wrong.

[trialbyerror]

Hi M
Firstly, welcome to GS

MY personal opinion is that the friend likes to play the power game, and would probibly swing if the 2 of you got into a wrestling game and you could pin him.

Could be, he would also swing if he pinned you, but then he would want to "top" you, or you give him head.

This kind of thing was quite common in boarding school, guys needed an "excuse" to cross the boundry of physical touching, but still be "in control" IE able to stop / allow to carry on any point without revealling true intention, so there was a lot of physical power play....

I stand open to correction, it is only my opinion

regards Trial

[Sylph]

Oh Hi Sis! :hello-handsome-smil

Kay, listen up close,

I actually agree with the suggestion of a power/domination thing.

And whilst I am no expert, #Team Virgin , I am a person who reads people quite easily(I think :p), and so to me it seems that he could have either 1 of three things going down with him;

1) He is 100% straight...as an Acute angel hunni, and he probably knows it and because you happen to be the nearest daisy around, he wants to see if he can test his thumb on your stem and pluck your petals to see if he can.

I've noticed a lot of "Straight" guys who indulge in for lack of a better term "Homo-erotic" behaviours, themselves are trying to feel out their sexuality or are trying to get you to feel them out, because they are uncomfortable with being "classically gay", you know, holding hands and trading purses.

I'm not sure, but this seems to be the story of "Masculine" gays, the experimental touches, all that blah, until they realize they like poles and not their local stripper's one.

Gurl, I came out the womb on a friggin Rainbow, so heck if I know, shoot -.-

2)

He genuinely is curious, and may actually like chicks, but perhaps sticks too, and as aforementioned, you are the closest Rose around and the fact that you didn't prick the hell out of him with them vicious thorns hunni, probably gave him the inclination that he could pluck your sweet smelling bud without opening up to his grabby hands.

This could be the case of sexual confusion and frustration. He wants to try it and wants to try it on you and you won't let him easily, so he's using the domination method to get what he wants.

There is a belief amongst many, that by refusing or to some "playing hard to get" incites a Man's instinct to chase/dominate/court, all that good ish
.

Which may or may not be true, however, in today's 2013, I'm sure saying no should not have you flopped over the table and thoroughly topped within an inch of your life...well perhaps not


3)

He like Mr.Bloomer has said, could just be a Bully, however to me personally, this seems like the least viable option, as Bullies tend not to involve emotional displays of affection without a deeper systemic reason for it and as such would possibly coincide with either 1 or 2 rather than be it's own sub-category...

However, it's still not to be ruled out completely.

He could be just playing on your sexuality to find amusement in it, but again, I highly doubt this is it only. It wouldn't make logical or emotional sense, and while people say Bully's don't make sense in general, this would be a serious oversight on their parts.


So in conclusions gurl, 1 or 2 would be my assessments of his behaviour and to go about acting on them, I would say;

Hit dat Bitch with the quick and tell him to go fuck his chicks and get up off my Dick.

You're not interested? Then let him know firmly what the deal is. Cut to the chase, shave off them edges, cut off the foreskin, don't allow there to be any confusions or misunderstandings between where you and he stay, and that he's touches and what not, while perhaps flattering are not appreciated and will not be tolerated.

He needs to know how to back up and give a Sis Space!

Hope I helped ma'am

Oh yea, and Welcome

[missourigaymer]

thanks to all of you for your advice!

Actually, I think Sylph is right on the money. I was bullied before in school, so I usually know what to expect. If he returns, I'll observe but not interact. If he choses to interact with me, I'll make sure to tell him what's ok and what is out of the question. Again, thanks everyone!!!

[Sylph]

thanks to all of you for your advice!

Actually, I think Sylph is right on the money. I was bullied before in school, so I usually know what to expect. If he returns, I'll observe but not interact. If he choses to interact with me, I'll make sure to tell him what's ok and what is out of the question. Again, thanks everyone!!!

No problem hunni.

Let your inner Lion pur-- I mean, Roar!

^.^ Show him you're not to be toyed with!

[Merc]

Even if he was curious, the guy is an asshat. Steer clear. He's the type that would expect you to 'take care of him' if the situation warranted it.

[Waylon777]

I agree on the observing. Just observe him for few days, and don't interact with him. See what happens, if he continues to act like some kid in a playground, tell him to GTFO.(well not that aggressively.)

[Rawr]

I think you need to run out and buy some chocolate and a taser. This calls for a Carrot an Stick retaliation method. His behavior is despicable really... and we should begin now to manipulate his behavior for the good of humanity.

When he shows signs of his vulgar behavior, simply taser him. When he acts nice, polite and accordingly, reward him with a piece of chocolate. Before long he will be a smashing gentlemen like yourself.

A side note; you may want to check if he has any heart problems before tasering him. Murder may seem like a quick solution now, but the time is endless, it'll play on your mind and eat at you from the inside. The inside of your cell that is. Other methods of pain are available.

I hope this helps.