Then it sounds you're on the right path and you can keep this friendship, which is good..kudos on talking to him
good luck in everything else!
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worst thing you could ever do is tell two people to not like each other, they'll just notice each other more and if there's any spark you can be assured they'll end up hooking up, sometimes even if there's no spark.
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I can't control nor would I want to control people's attraction to each other. They had only met that night, and I'll admit to accidentally making my female friend think I felt more than I did. I made it clear that them having some mindless hookup would make me upset and uncomfortable, because it just goes back to the lying and sneaking thing that hits me rather hard on both of their counts. Apparently, he was intent on doing so that night and didn't only because I might catch them and it would ruin my birthday party, and honestly I'm not sure if I should take that as a blatant insult (MY party, MY house, MY property, MY... supplies) or as a very loose sign of actual consideration (I would've, but you would've found out cause her lipstick would have given me away). lol Idk, he claims he's a "what you don't know won't hurt you" kind of guy.
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Err, a little bit wrong, yes. I get that you didn't want your friends to date, but your crush is straight. This was going to happen someday. That it happened with a friend allows you to direct feelings of bitterness and resentment at someone, and feel justified doing so. Honestly, if your crush had suddenly confessed to liking you, and you began to share deep and touching discussions, jokes, etc., and a friend asked you not to date, how much would that influence you? For most people, not a lot...Personally speaking, none of my friends wanted me to date who I'm dating, and while their opinions will always be of value to me, who I date is never going to be a decision that they get to make for me. That they respect this is important to me, as I imagine it is for most people.
Perhaps your friendship is similar? I also would like to remind you that you mentioned he'd be a terrible boyfriend anyway, so why do you care? IF this is literally the only significant issue you have with your friends, seriously, let it go. If this is the final straw in regards to a general trend of them not really caring about you, maybe politely drift away... but do note, they seem like they care. Whether or not they realized they liked each other or not at the particular setting of your birthday party, they did attend. They are your friends.
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haha, I feel like a crush involves a strong desire to be with someone, which physically may be true (lol), but that's really the extent of it. It's like I said, I don't care about them really wanting to pursue each other, or just being attracted to each other. It's simply the lying, sneaking, and disrespectful way they did or were willing to go about it. Like I told him, both of them would have had to tell me so many lies to keep up the secret, and THAT is what is really bothering me, especially because everything he said kind of made it seem like it was convenient he could spin it in a way that made it seem like I mattered, but I didn't really matter. I'm trying to just take the good away from everything he said, and just leave the bad in the past. That way, I can move on however is best for me, whether it's keeping him as a friend but to a different degree, or just waiting out the last week of classes with civility and then just letting the kid go.
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Am I wrong here?
