Frustration at not feeling valued

[MisterTinkles]

How do I survive this great loneliness? This dark emptiness? How can I live the rest of my life like this?

When they tell you how "its supposed to be", you come back with "I dont think so".
And then tell them WHY you dont think so.

Like pepper spray in the face of an attacker...........the truth burns, they will never bother you again. Those that come back to talk to you, well.......those are the ones you do want to get to know.

[Pix]

I'm wondering if you're not making the same mistake many straight guys do: they think they have to have the best looking babes but are hurt, angry, and depressed (a few have even gotten homicidal over it with one shooting up a gym because fine women wouldn't have sex with him and him not caring about his own desirability) because such women who invest a lot of time, money, and effort into their looks expect a lot in return (wealth, looks, style, etc). They complain no woman wants them yet they won't even consider a woman unless she's a total hottie...and then they complain about women as a whole rather than themselves.

Are you hanging around these guys because they're the only ones you're attracted to? Or meet them over hookup sites who are just looking for fuck buddies rather than real relationships?

I don't know if you are or not, but if you are then that's what's happening. I've lived in many places and while many men of any sexual orientation are obsessed with the looks of their partner (and sometimes their own) it wasn't so that you had to put out the effort of a model or be turned away at the door. All sorts of people got into relationships whatever their looks. Looks help, but it's not like every single person demands you look like a model or whatever.

Just one example off the top of my head, a popular gay couple...I don't mean to say anything bad about their appearances (I'd say about average "guy next door" looks) but they're a family now:




Do they look like gay porn actors?

[Drkmcnamara]

Honestly if I am to take away the toxic people in life I am going to be totally isolated and alone. But I have to figure how to survive and live life as a friendless hermit. I am going to have to embrace the great loneliness and make the most of it

[Drkmcnamara]

I am crying cuz it is a Saturday night and while I am here feeling alone and drinking a little, the guys who rejected me are all cuddling up to each other, kissing and singing about how they all belong in this one big gay family. I feel like such a loser because this is my life

[southbiochem]

that would be your choice..

you are choosing to believe what people not worth your time will tell you..

if you keep this up you won't succeed..

if you keep believing they are right, your self confidence will vanish and that is something people won't find appealing.

it will be a self-fulfilling prophecy..

also, keep in mind you're but 21..

really, that is no age to be predicting you'll always be alone

you simply don't know that for a fact


there's plenty of time for things to change

[Drkmcnamara]

Look they are the only ones available right now if they were not I would disregard them

[Drkmcnamara]

This might sound real pathetic but all I want right now is for some guy to come hug me and tell me that everything is going to be ok

[MisterTinkles]

Honestly if I am to take away the toxic people in life I am going to be totally isolated and alone. But I have to figure how to survive and live life as a friendless hermit. I am going to have to embrace the great loneliness and make the most of it

There ARE real people out there. Really!!!!! And a lot of them live in your area!!!
You just have to play the "gay" version of Wheres Waldo. LOL

http://www.sagaychamber.com/homepage.php

I think your best bet is to volunteer some time to some organizations. They dont necessarily need to be "gay" organizations either. Volunteering gets you OUT there and meeting people.

You can volunteer for lots of different things:

Food pantries
ASPCA/animal shelters
Nursing homes
Hospices
Children s hospital
Organizational "do's", like banquets and charity events

You might see if you can volunteer for some help for the RHPS, or even audition for a part?
http://drafthouse.com/movies/the_rocky_h...an_antonio


There is also some things you can get into for fun........

Childrens live theater
Amateur theater
Book readings/story telling


You might even try a part time weekend job at SeaWorld or something like that.
I worked at 6 Flags Over Texas one summer and got to know some people there, and one ended up being a friend.

You just have to get out there.

[southbiochem]

so, because they are the only ones available you're going to let them trash you?

No sir, you're better off alone than in that kind of company.

Move on, there ARE others..

[Drkmcnamara]

I am out there though it is not like I sit on my ass at home all day I am getting out there and this is what I am getting guys