freinds mum asks my advice

[chillythoughts]

... which is also shitty. Just calling it as I see it.

I know it is kyle.

[nfisher1226]

Well it's like this. None of us know enough to really understand any of you, except as it relates to our own lives and experience.

So from my experience, first off dating a closeted guy is rough, period. Although it happens. My boyfriend is a pastor, and would lose his job if our relationship became known. And here I'm a very non-religious guy who wants nothing to do with church, dating a closeted pastor. Which I bring up just to point out, the heart is pretty damn unpredictable. If you love this guy, or even if you just enjoy fucking him, I'm not going to say you're a shit or anything like that. You're human.

That said this is a bit of a pickle. I tend to disagree with the sentiment of coming clean to the mom, unless he's the one doing it. It may be that his conversation with her was the start of that process actually. Anyway the decision about when and where to let mom know he's having sex with men is his decision to make, and his alone. What is more of a problem is the girlfriend. If she doesn't know then that's not exactly fair to her. I still wouldn't be the one to tell her, but it would be a big factor in what I decided to do with the guy.

But even if you don't have enough of a moral compass to consider the girlfriend's feelings here, you have to admit that being involved with him under present circumstances has put you right in the middle of a moral dilemma and a rather uncomfortable position. I don't like that sort of thing myself and would probably run for the hills, but you have to figure it out for yourself here.