My BF is the same way, I don't really act gay at all and he told me the other night that the thing that scared him the most would be that I told him I was no longer attracted to guys. Fortunately for us both however that will never be the case because he is so damn amazing and im crazy attracted to him, even visiting mom when I brought him along mom kept commenting on how much more I smile and laugh and said that when I talk about him my voice takes a much softer tone. Even if he worries you a little take his word for it, if the guy is having sex with you he is very attracted to you, a straight guy would find laying with another man disgusting and it seems your ahem "sex life" is pretty strong lol. If there is anything I have learned over relationships the worst enemy is yourself and your own worries or insecurities.
wishing for you the best!
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I've often noticed that many gay men do not like the more feminine gay men and that appeal goes down the "swishier" they get. A lot of gay men like men for sex, to play golf with, have a beer with but all that maintains a certain element of heterosexuality. I have yet to hear two gay guys, at the bowling alley, call each other "sister" or "sweetheart" or similar. But you've thrown a curve, he wants you to take on more feminine apparel, but only to a point. You don't say or qualify how "feminine" you are so it's not possible to comment. But I do have a suggestion; Swing it back to what he doesn't seem to want. Be a guy, not a guy with feminine leanings but a guy who has a job, drops by the local for a beer and tells him you're tired of his telling you what to do, how to dress etc. Either he can like you for the real you or he'd best look elsewhere. You're concern does you credit because you're trying to stay the authentic you while he's trying to push you to be something in which you've no interest. To shake him up, get some underwear that (from Koala) that hides his penis and testicles. Tell him you'd like him more if he were the feminine one and left you as the man you are. He's taking advantage of the disparity in your height and, my friend, one of the meanest, dirtiest street fighters, and nicest guys, was your height. All man on the street and all gay in bed; There should be more like him...perhaps that's a role model for you to consider.
Charon
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In all honesty, it sounds like you're generalizing. I mean, my last bf was much more feminine than me and and I'm masculine. Not macho type, but enough that people don't suspect me to be gay. Yeah, most masc' gay guys go for masc' guys like themselves, but that doesn't mean every masc' guy is like that and vice versa with fem' guys.
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You're a guy. Your boyfriend is a guy. He likes fucking you - a guy - in the ass. So, how is he not gay? You seem to be confusing his preference for feminine qualities with preference for women, and that is your misunderstanding, not his.
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I'm a lesbian , a lipstick lesbian if you want to get a specific on what I look like how i dress and I am not attracted to masculine women , i only like femmes . I think a man can be gay and like men who are feminine and even if your feminine your still a man . I think a lot of people confuse gender identity with sexual orientation .
I also use to worry because I like being the bottom with other lesbians and prefer a woman on top of me if that made me not so lesbian until I realized I was not the only lesbian that like being a bottom and dominated by other women and there are some lesbians that like being tops and some like me who like being bottoms ( even though I will switch if asked to but I prefer the bottom ) I even know a lesbian that only like masculine types or butch lesbians so why can't it be the same for a gay man when you take off a masculine lesbians clothes you see that she's still a woman and if you take off a feminine gay man's clothes he's still a man . He would be not gay if he was attracted to women
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I haven't noticed that masculine lesbians are particularly popular. However, pillow princesses and married bisexuals in an unhappy (or at least sexually disappointing) straight marriage tend to prefer them believing they get sex without having to "return the favor." There's a belief--wrong more often than not--that masculine lesbians "don't like to be touched" and therefore the one who specifically looks for masculine lesbians feels she can be spoiled rotten (sexually at least). In the case of the married they also figure such women are much less likely to stalk, that is they feel more comfortable that "it's just sex" rather than a "regular woman" getting all obsessed and smothering and/or that she doesn't have to worry about her husband wanting to get involved and possibly being replaced.
The strange thing is that while sometimes masculine lesbians are expressing a side of themselves, others are actually doing it to declare they only want girly girls and believe their look will drive away the undesirables while attracting that which they want. This alienates many who'd otherwise be attracted to her, however. I also think females tend to be trained in gender roles in relationships more as well so some unconsciously live up to them (any age but especially those 40 and older).
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Is my bf really gay?
Capricorn
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