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I'm a : Single Gay Man
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"JWS Forget about him! If he wanted to meet u but was actually busy he'd say I'm busy tonight but how another day. If he hasn't suggested another time to meet he's trying to say politely that he's not interested."
Hi JWS, I'm not disagreeing with you at all, you're most likely right. But politely saying he's not interested by not saying anything at all? I could start a whole new thread dedicated to how much I HATE the silent treatment. It's like do people really have to be that childish? I mean it takes 2 seconds to say to someone "I'm not interested" boom! Done! With that you know where you stand, but when you get nothing it hurts.
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A number of people have mentioned this but...what ever happened to start by being a friend? He's done nothing wrong. Okay, he hasn't called or sent you a text when YOU expected it but....he gave you no reason to expect it. He gave you his number and I don't see where you've used it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with ringing someone to just say you'd enjoyed the talk in the car and you'd hoped for a return engagement. And, while you're on the phone, see if you can find out some other mutual interests. One has to work on friendships but one that is well established can go a lot further than a flash in the motel just because someone is cute....Fifty five years ago I took my first lover-and kept him until he died 16 years later-but that didn't start with much more than you've described. Nothing you write suggests he's uninterested in you. And all the people who say he's a flake or dump him are making very hasty judgments. After all, they don't even know him. Take your time, let things develop if they will and, even if they don't, you'll still have someone to call on the spur of the moment to go to the ball game or go get a drink or whatever.
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Posts: 877
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I'm a : Single Gay Man
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Charon, you are right. I understand what you are trying to say that he doesn't owe me anything and you're right. What's stopping me from actually calling him? Plainly and simply, I feel like I've missed my boat. Had I'd called him like a day after he messaged saying he enjoyed meeting me, and asked if he wanted to hang out, that would have been perfect timing. However, the last time we spoke via messages was May 1st, I tried messaging him on May 4th and again on May 10th, he never replied back to me, I've not heard from him at all since May 1st.
Oh sure, I could still call him, but I'm afraid to. My 1 gay friend once said, don't ever let a guy know how much you care or he will go running in the other direction. Seeing as though he has not reciprocated to me since May 1st it's seems obvious he doesn't want to talk for whatever reason (busy, not interested, another guy, etc). I'm worried if I try to call him it will push him further away. I'd like to tell him what Cuddly said that I'd like to hang out but feel pushy asking but I'm not sure how to put that in words.
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