48 and confused.

[J0ePaGuy11]

I'm 48 and I know my family wouldn't agree with my "preferences." Is it better to keep it to myself after all these years or risk what I fer most?

[Borg69]

What do you have to lose ???

[J0ePaGuy11]

Most of my family possibly!

[MikeW]

You aren't giving us enough information. When you say "family" are you talking about wife and children or parents and siblings or both? And why do you think they wouldn't accept you.

[BlueStar]

You can't live your whole life in the closet, inside lies. Ok now I'm still forced to, but your family should end up accepting you after all these years, even if that takes them some long time.

[Cuddly]

At the end of the day, your life is yours to live. Living solely for the purpose of your family and their expectations simply isn't living. You've lied to yourself and those around you for long enough...

Having been in the closet and come out, I can tell you, I would be better off out and proud without my family (in the scenario where they cut me off entirely, which they didn't in reality!), than I was in the closet as a scared and confused teenager.
What makes you think you will lose your family if you come out?

[Jake]

At the end of the day, your life is yours to live.

Couldn't agree more with Cuddly on that, at 48 years old I can understand that you have had a long life running, but at the end of the day, your life is your life, in fact your adult life started as soon as you got out of your parent's home and start living on your own.

I'm just 38, but at 29 I took the decision that I was in control of my own life and while I love my family very much they will have to accept or reject the real me, and the real me is the dude who loves being with other dudes. And yes I have children and yes it was a shock for them but they got over it, in fact they were very proud that I stopped lying to them and to myself, And they loved Alex lol, what not to love about that dude LOL, he's charming, smoking hot and very attentionated.

So take control of your life, you only have one.

[ChadCoxRox]

I didn't come out to my family. I just lived my life openly, tended to my own business and didn't care if they accepted my partner or lifestyle or not. It was not an option for them. It is my life and they know I will live it as I choose, wanting and hoping for their acceptance just as assuredly as I'd not give a rat's ass beyond initial disappointment if they refuse to cooperate! Of course I was never dependent on any of them for any of my own independent well being so that certainly helps my stance.

Your post left me wanting more info so I could not respond to your situation, hence a bit of my own.
Welcome to the GS family! I am certain if you hand around you'll find good support through your journey friend!

[polfsky]

Can you assess how your family will take it? I'm 37 and in the closet too. I plan to tell my family (parent and siblings) some time this year. I think they already suspect it any way and will finally hear it out of my mouth.

[Iceblink]

In another thread you mentioned that you are paralyzed from the shoulders down. So I have a question, are you able through the use of technology to get around on your own or have assistance that is provided to you, or are you dependent, somewhat or otherwise, on help from your family and friends? I'm wondering if this is a consideration for you that most of us do not have.