Twanno Wrote:Also, most of you seem to have thought that he is mentally disabled and dangerous. Guys, I'm not an idiot, yes it may have been stupid of me to give him my address, but i am a god judge of character, i wouldn't have done it unless i was 100% sure he wasn't dangerous or mean spirited, he is not. I have skyped him a couple times and had genuine conversations. he said that stuff about san fran and all that because he thought he really liked me or something i dunno, im not trying to stand up for him, more for myself.
Telling my parents isn't the issue, it's the shock they'll get when they open that envelope, which is totally out of my control
I'm confused, man. How is threatening(and you believing) that he will send this conversation and pictures to your parents via mail make him NOT mean spirited or dangerous? He obviously scared you enough with the threats that you felt the need to share and get advice....so maybe you're just trying to see the good and ignoring the bad?
I still think you should absolutely NOT meet with him, all things considered. Though if you do, please make absolutely certain that you meet in a public place(no picking you up in a car) and that you let someone responsible know where you are and who you'll be with.
And if your parents already know, and you are certain he'll follow through with the threat...why not just say that you're having an issue with someone who is threatening to make you look bad and ask them to toss the mail if they do receive it(and you aren't able to snatch it up first)
There is no way I'd give in just to appease some threat like that. It's bullying and it's a shitty thing to do, a shitty thing even to THREATEN to do.
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Twanno Wrote:Also, most of you seem to have thought that he is mentally disabled and dangerous. Guys, I'm not an idiot, yes it may have been stupid of me to give him my address, but i am a god judge of character, i wouldn't have done it unless i was 100% sure he wasn't dangerous or mean spirited, he is not. I have skyped him a couple times and had genuine conversations. he said that stuff about san fran and all that because he thought he really liked me or something i dunno, im not trying to stand up for him, more for myself.
Telling my parents isn't the issue, it's the shock they'll get when they open that envelope, which is totally out of my control
You do not have the life experience yet to understand that he IS dangerous. I am assuming you are 18 as your profile states. No one at 18 has the skills to deal with someone like him...that is why he said it.
You say he isn't mean spirited or dangerous ....how do you reconcile that with what he threatened to do???? You have a disconnect somewhere. You should know where it is...I guarantee you that he DOES know where it is.
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Yeah, no one here is judging you for what you did. If he's threatening you, 'twisting your arm' to get to meet you, that is at the very least manipulative and dishonest (and I would say illegal, harassment, if you have asked him to leave you alone).
Also, although your parents might be shocked if they found out it isn't going to ruin them for life. It will probably 'scare' them in the sense that they'll be concerned for your safety. I understand this is something you'd find embarrassing (as anyone would) but, still, it would be far worse if something happened to you.
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if you delete your grindr account then your message disappears at his end so he as nothing to show, correct me if i have gone way off subject here
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Dennis Wrote:if you delete your grindr account then your message disappears at his end so he as nothing to show, correct me if i have gone way off subject here They started off on grinder then moved to Skype. The other guy has screen caps of the Skype conversation (or so he claims) and that's what he's threatening the OP with.
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Twanno Wrote:Also, most of you seem to have thought that he is mentally disabled and dangerous. Guys, I'm not an idiot, yes it may have been stupid of me to give him my address, but i am a god judge of character, i wouldn't have done it unless i was 100% sure he wasn't dangerous or mean spirited, he is not. I have skyped him a couple times and had genuine conversations. he said that stuff about san fran and all that because he thought he really liked me or something i dunno, im not trying to stand up for him, more for myself.
Telling my parents isn't the issue, it's the shock they'll get when they open that envelope, which is totally out of my control
you can be a very good judge of character but it is something that does not apply to online conversations. it is in the body language where character shows. dry words on the internet don't reveal a person's tone of voice, his comport, nervousness, etc.
also it is impossible to reconcile blackmail and personal threats with ''not mean-spirited''. you correctly identified him as ''weird'' after he wanted you to move in with him from some internet convos alone. that was an absolutely correct judgment to make.
i'd like to quote something else you said in your first post:
Quote:And he got really mad and said that he would screenshot the convos we'd had (most of which were not exactly PG) as well as some pictures id sent him and he would send them in the mail to my parents with no name so they'd open it and see it.
this is not a normal reaction. and this is not a nice guy. he may not be insane but he has issues.
the simple fact alone that he wanted to do all those things -- fly you to San Francisco, and have you move in -- when all he'd ever known you from was an online convo -- says this guy is not safe. you initially made the right call by telling him that you wouldn't even stay in touch with him and that is exactly what you should do right now. if your parents know, all the better. and i'm also sure, that if you tell your parents that you talked to a guy on the internet and he turned weird wanting you to move in and then threatening you, they will understand should the envelope finally arrive, if it ever does. believe me, your parents would much rather deal with some naked pictures of you and some dirty talk, than you going and meeting this guy in person.
also -- your parents are not clueless. they already know that a boy your age has sex on his mind. non-PG rated content will hardly shock them. it might make you uncomfortable having your parents see that content and that is a normal feeling, but it's not as bad as you think it will be.
DO NOT meet this guy and stop talking to him.
good luck.
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This other "threatening" person needs to grow up don't he?
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Still think you should report him to Skype...
As horrible as this may be, can picture it now: "18 year old goes missing because of Skype stalker."
It's already happened with other social media, may as well happen with Skype now too.
This is no joke dude. Please take what we are telling you seriously. We are only trying to help you and looking out for your safety. We have the voice of experience and an outsider's objective perspective.
You don't get rid of a threatening stalker by hanging out or going to lunch with him.
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