I feel like nothing has changed since last year :(

[Radbot42]

If anyone remembers my introduction topic. I was really depressed when I first came around here. As 2014 came around it was a decent year for the most part. I posted this in the What's on your mind topic, but felt like re-posting it here.

Kinda shitty. Found out my ex that broke up with me over distance, moved to a city an hour away, while I was dating someone else. Now that I know he lives closer, I am single again, and that I am in the job hunt, I have been wondering if there is any chance we could get back together. I know it's unhealthy, but he's all I can think about. I've considered getting a job in that city and then getting a hold of him if the job sticks. I've also been thinking about just contacting him now to see if there could be anything. No matter what I think about doing it can't lead to anything good, but I feel like I need to contact him at some point. Just feels like something I need to do. I feel like I've turned into that creepy guy that will never move on. I kinda hate that he's all I think about. I have to force myself to even take a substitute teaching job.

If anything I feel like things have just gotten worse. I know everyone here is going to tell me to not text him, but I think I am going to text him this weekend. I feel like potentially getting a rejection from him in some way will be better than sitting here wondering what if.

[Cuddly]

What's the worst that can happen? If you get rejected, atleast you know where you stand. Then you can start moving on.

[Rareboy]

Go ahead and text him.

But first ask yourself why he hasn't tried to contact you. He apparently already made his choice about your relationship and has moved on.

When you look for a job, do it for the right reasons....do it for yourself. Not because it might throw you in the path of an ex.

[wayward]

I think it is better you move on. Try to re-involve yourself in the interests you've put on hold. Talk to people who have no connection with your ex. If you find yourself able to refocus, I think you will find more has changed than you realize. Feel free to send me a message if you'd like more support. I hope something happens for you to open up your perspective.

[BlueStar]

Contact him once, release that crippling need to do it. Often a contact after breakups can help us move on.

[ShiftyNJ]

Know how this feels; agree that it sucks

[East]

I think contacting him might release your obsession and it will work out the way it will...one way or another.

It will help to let go of any expectations before you contact him....

Did you break up on good terms?

[Borg69]

I think contacting him might release your obsession and it will work out the way it will...one way or another.

It will help to let go of any expectations before you contact him....

Did you break up on good terms?

I agree... I think you're obsessed. You gotta let it go and move on. Not everything in life works out. What if you don't get that job? What if you miss out on that big sale? What if you don't get that apartment you wanted? What if someone grabs the last doughnut?

Are you going to waste the rest of your life pining away for what you feel you lost out on and what COULD have been, trying to regain what you feel you've lost?

MOVE ON. Look forward. Whatever it is that you think you might have missed out on left the door open for something BETTER to come along. Go look for those something betters.

[Radbot42]

Just to answer a few questions, it is complicated how we broke up. As I said we were long distance. We never fought, and everything seemed to be getting better and better between us. He ran into some money problems, and I think that is where everything went bad. He said he couldn't deal with the distance anymore, and said it was too hard for him if he could not see me whenever he wanted to. We were about 3 hours apart at the time.

I've thought about why he hasn't tried to contact me and there are several potential reasons. I am prepared for the worst, although still terrified of what will happen. I plan on texting him around 6 p.m. EST tomorrow night, and plan to be in the chat room on this site. So if anyone is willing to just be there for me no matter the consequence it would be greatly appreciated. I know this might end up badly for me, but I don't care.

I was honestly surprised that the majority of people that responded think I should contact him though, I thought it would be the complete opposite. I just hope this actually helps me.

[Radbot42]

Well I texted him, and it took him about 20 minutes to ask who it was. When I said my name he has yet to respond, if he doesn't by 8 (about a half hour) I'm going to text him this:

It's apparent you don't want to talk. I hope you are doing well, and I will leave you alone forever now.