11-26-2014, 11:29 PM
Hello GS. Where to begin...
So last Friday I went to some gay bars with my bondage buddy, the other guy in the club he hooks up with, and the other guys husband, and a few others I didn't know.
Fun night, my buddy was pretty wasted and lot's of making out and stuff of that nature. It was a crazy time, but lot's of fun.
Sunday was club night, as is usually the case, my buddy was far more distant and somewhat distracted by events outside the club. The other guy (the one he hooks up with) had to work so he was there at the beginning of the night and returend at the end to help close up.
I was drinking which is typical there. However, I drank more than usual and as you may imagine, this was not such a good thing.
I ended up talking to the owner of the club (who I talk to regularly and is very close to the other guys mentioned). I tell him about my asking my buddy if he wanted to hook up and tell the tale I've mentioned in here. That's not a big deal really, but I did mention something my buddy said that I would undo if I had the chance. Nothing thats a big deal, but not really for me to have said imo.
That was event number one.
Then I was talking to another club member who I know in lose way. We end up playing around a bit, while doing so my buddy at one pont was sitting next to us and I kind of seen him look over and notice. It is a sex club, and we weren't doing anyting over the top, but I don't usually do anything with guys in there besides the bondage during scenes.
As this is going on I miss my window to catch the bus. It's a Sunday night and I have work early on Mondays. I blow it off as not a big deal, stay to the end of the night, and use uber to get home.
I get home late as hell, get about 3 hours of sleep, sleep through my alarm and end up going to work an hour late. (Supervisor is always late and not there so this went unnoticed).
I'm dead tired all day. Not to mention VERY stressed and concerned/embarrassed about the evening.
All the above mentioned is not my nature. Friday is club night (a post thanksgiving party) and I'll be going. I'm not sure how my buddy is going to react to all the above mentioned things.
I plan to mention how stressed I was on Monday, missing the bus, staying later then I should have, being late for work, and drinking to much and acting out of character.
In my own mind I've painted this picture with the darkest colors, and alos in the way I've told the story. I hope putting to much weight on one night of sloppy drinking, but I won't really know until I'm there and see how things feel.
I don't know why I drank so much and how I let things unfold the way they did.
This is a mistake at this place I will not make again.
Oh, I haven't mentioned this stuff in a while. I'm no longer trying to hook up with this guy. At some point if events were to lead to something I'd still be game. But in no way am I actively pushing for anything. He's really young, has to much already going on, and the hot and cold thing is to confusing to me. If we had a sexual relationship, that last part would become an issue for me.
That's it. I've gotten a lot of praise in here in regards to my self awarness and awareness of others and things of this nature.
It's always nice, but I'm still a flawed man and do fuk up from time to time.
I'll provide an update Saturday, I'll tell if I've made it worse than it is, or it's worse then I thought.
So last Friday I went to some gay bars with my bondage buddy, the other guy in the club he hooks up with, and the other guys husband, and a few others I didn't know.
Fun night, my buddy was pretty wasted and lot's of making out and stuff of that nature. It was a crazy time, but lot's of fun.
Sunday was club night, as is usually the case, my buddy was far more distant and somewhat distracted by events outside the club. The other guy (the one he hooks up with) had to work so he was there at the beginning of the night and returend at the end to help close up.
I was drinking which is typical there. However, I drank more than usual and as you may imagine, this was not such a good thing.
I ended up talking to the owner of the club (who I talk to regularly and is very close to the other guys mentioned). I tell him about my asking my buddy if he wanted to hook up and tell the tale I've mentioned in here. That's not a big deal really, but I did mention something my buddy said that I would undo if I had the chance. Nothing thats a big deal, but not really for me to have said imo.
That was event number one.
Then I was talking to another club member who I know in lose way. We end up playing around a bit, while doing so my buddy at one pont was sitting next to us and I kind of seen him look over and notice. It is a sex club, and we weren't doing anyting over the top, but I don't usually do anything with guys in there besides the bondage during scenes.
As this is going on I miss my window to catch the bus. It's a Sunday night and I have work early on Mondays. I blow it off as not a big deal, stay to the end of the night, and use uber to get home.
I get home late as hell, get about 3 hours of sleep, sleep through my alarm and end up going to work an hour late. (Supervisor is always late and not there so this went unnoticed).
I'm dead tired all day. Not to mention VERY stressed and concerned/embarrassed about the evening.
All the above mentioned is not my nature. Friday is club night (a post thanksgiving party) and I'll be going. I'm not sure how my buddy is going to react to all the above mentioned things.
I plan to mention how stressed I was on Monday, missing the bus, staying later then I should have, being late for work, and drinking to much and acting out of character.
In my own mind I've painted this picture with the darkest colors, and alos in the way I've told the story. I hope putting to much weight on one night of sloppy drinking, but I won't really know until I'm there and see how things feel.
I don't know why I drank so much and how I let things unfold the way they did.
This is a mistake at this place I will not make again.
Oh, I haven't mentioned this stuff in a while. I'm no longer trying to hook up with this guy. At some point if events were to lead to something I'd still be game. But in no way am I actively pushing for anything. He's really young, has to much already going on, and the hot and cold thing is to confusing to me. If we had a sexual relationship, that last part would become an issue for me.
That's it. I've gotten a lot of praise in here in regards to my self awarness and awareness of others and things of this nature.
It's always nice, but I'm still a flawed man and do fuk up from time to time.
I'll provide an update Saturday, I'll tell if I've made it worse than it is, or it's worse then I thought.