I Dont Know When

[Bob]

So Im 21 Years Old And Still "in The Closet". Im Not Really Liking That Phrase Much. Its Really Hard For Me But I Know Its Hard For Everyone. I Know My Family Know, My Parents And My Brothers. But I Just Cant Find The Courage To Actually Tell Them. Its Hard Enough For Me To Actually Say It When Im By Myself. I Know It'll Be Hard To Tell My Closest Friends Too. I Know They'd Understand But I Just Dont Know. How Would They Look At Me You Know? I Just Dont Know When Ill Find The Courage To Come Out To Everyone. I Mean I've Had One Girlfriend That Didnt Last Very Long. To Be Honest It Only Lasted 2 Months And That Was In High School. We Just Made Out Alot. No Sex. Though I Wanted To But I Just Know There'd Be A Problem. She Was Really Hot And Still Is. What Would She Say If I Come Out To Her Then? Some Of My Friends Have Asked Me If I Was Gay And Of Course I Said No. It Hurts When They Ask =[. But They Deserve To Know The Truth. There Are Times When I Couldnt Sleep And I Just Really Wanted To Cry And Tell Someone. I Should Stop Here I Just Want To Know What You Guys Think?

I was in the same boat as you Cross! Not everyone, but a few people knew that I swung that way, but it was left unspoken. and when people actually asked if I was gay/bi, it really hurt my feelings and I, too, said no. To this day, I still am in the closet, but about three of my close friends actually know, at first I found it difficult telling them, and I panicked thinking that they would tell other people or judge me differently, but none of that happened. You don't necessarily have to sing out your sexuality for the whole world to hear, but it's good to have a real friend to talk to about it. I've told my parents twice now but they shrugged it off as a just a phase each time. Some things should just be left unsaid. The girlfriends I have had, i've had sex with, but it took me a very long time to do the act. But I understand where your coming from, it also annoys me when friend's friends ask on one of the first times they meet me, whether i'm gay. It's a conversation killer and it makes me really paranoid.

Bobx

[Woolfe]

Methinks my wonderful brethren on here have already answered this as much as I would, just really reiterating that finding a LGBTQ group would be a good start, as well as all else, they can give you first-hand support and motivation.

Also, if you've got one or two female friends you're close to, sometimes a good idea to come out to them first, from my experience and that of others, tends to be the easiest option, and there's a good chance you'd be able to get them to go with you to a gay bar/club so you're not facing that particularly daunting step alone?

Anyways, best of luck mon cheri, the best wishes of GS go with you. XD

Ky xxx

[Australia]

Thanks guys. There's a lot of good advices on here. I think I will go to that meeting and check it out. I will tell you guys how it goes. mile:

Yes. Make sure you go. And don't chicken out. You dont know the people there so you have nothing to lose. It sounds pretty cool. I wish I was going

[Star Twister]

Some truly great advice here Cross, I can't add anything more except I hope this situation works out for you and ends up the way you hope.

Much Love Mister


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[zeon]

Hi,
It would be interesting to find out how the meeting goes best of luck with it

kindest regards

zeon

[CrossNecklace]

I was in the same boat as you Cross! Not everyone, but a few people knew that I swung that way, but it was left unspoken. and when people actually asked if I was gay/bi, it really hurt my feelings and I, too, said no. To this day, I still am in the closet, but about three of my close friends actually know, at first I found it difficult telling them, and I panicked thinking that they would tell other people or judge me differently, but none of that happened. You don't necessarily have to sing out your sexuality for the whole world to hear, but it's good to have a real friend to talk to about it. I've told my parents twice now but they shrugged it off as a just a phase each time. Some things should just be left unsaid. The girlfriends I have had, i've had sex with, but it took me a very long time to do the act. But I understand where your coming from, it also annoys me when friend's friends ask on one of the first times they meet me, whether i'm gay. It's a conversation killer and it makes me really paranoid.

Bobx

Thanks for sharing. It's cool to find out that I wasn't the only one.

And thanks again guys. The meeting thing is in 3 days. I'm not gonna lie, I'm freaking out. I'm getting nervous as it gets closer and closer. Though there are 2 meetings on that day that will go on at the same time. There's the Coming Out Group and Youth Program Social Group. Which one should I join????? And I've been thinking about coming out to my dad first and I mean before this meeting. Might happen tomorrow, I dont know. Depends if I actually build up the courage to do so.

[CrossNecklace]

Yes. Make sure you go. And don't chicken out. You dont know the people there so you have nothing to lose. It sounds pretty cool. I wish I was going

I wish I knew you and that you were going with me too cuz I'm scared to do it alone.

[CrossNecklace]

Hey guys.
I've been thinking of what I would say when I do come out to my dad, whether its tomorrow or the next day or whenever. All right, this is how it might go:

"Hey dad. I know it's not healthy to keep things to myself. And you and Mom have taught us to share our feelings and tell you what's going on when we have problems. And you, yourself, was depressed once and you had to take therapy. So I'm at that point when I can't keep things to myself anymore. I know that you know and I guess you're just waiting for me to say...that...I'm...gay [deep breath]...and and there's this group meeting thing that's on Wednesday night that can maybe help me out. What do you think??"

...and what do you guys think???

[fjp999]

Perfect!

Wouldnt change a thing!

Best of luck!

[CrossNecklace]

Perfect!

Wouldnt change a thing!

Best of luck!

You think so?! Sweet! Thank you!