Do you fall for guys who treat you badly?

[Ralwatt]

Hiya babes,
When in a relationship if you love someone you tend to put up with alot of shit from them.. I have had four previous partners and three of them treated me like shit but when your in love love is blind...

James - number 1,

I met him on gaydar and we arranged to meet.. Now james told me that i was unable to have sex with him unless i told him we were offically and item (it was our first day so that night i for the sake of needing a shag) told him that i loved him but didnt and got my way.. As the days went by he was caring to start with but the moment i spoke to a guy called shane he went a bit mad and envious about the whole situation.. Shane seemed to show alot of care about me and looking back on it i should have ditched james there and then but didnt.. I found that he was becoming more and more possessive to the point he was pissing me off and i ditched him and got a train back home...

Mark - 2nd boyfriend

Mark i met on a online game known as Myth of soma.. All seemed well and i moved to inverness... When i got there it was going good and then a week later he told me his father was Anti english and i wasnt welcome.. I was kinda upset and said ok ill go but will be back at christmas babes and he was cool with that.. I returned at christmas and found out he had been shagging my best mate which by this time i had moved in offically and was heart broken.. I sat up all night listening to Hero by enrique Eglias typing a letter to mark about us and sobbing my heart out.. He didnt care he told me i was to sleep in the spare bed as him and simon are sleeping in the bed where we once shared our memories.. I was totally devistated and upon returning home i listened to gareth gates anyone one of us and slashed my arms legs, any part of my body i could get blood to flow from open. I was a nervous wreck.. Id smoked 80 cigarettes in one day and was stressed to the eyeballs.. I suffered depression for 18 months and lost 8-9 stone in weight.. I just felt as though life was not worth living and mark was still controlling my life even after i moved away as he was telling me he wanted me and i was falling for it but never went back up there.. I was totally shattered... I had thrown several lighters one night in a bus shelter at him and simon for making out infront of me and then got kicked out.. Had to steal 50 quid to get home and spent one night in a BNB in inverness bleeding whilst i went to sleep.. My mind was totally fucked...

Liam - 3rd partner

Liam i met through a friend.. We walked to brighton marina and shared a kiss at the end of the arm leading out to sea and it was nice he took me to my first gay club and sex was great just his friend got possessive of him and that ended that one

Dan 4th boyfriend

Dan was a sweet guy just never spoke much and i think in three months of being with him i had got about 6 sentences out of him... One night i was cooking dinner cutting up turkey meat when i broke down in tears and said babes i got something i need to tell you.. He said whats that?? I then said im sorry but i have fallen completely out of love with you.. I dont know why or how but i no longer love you.. Your a good friend and the love aspect isnt there anymore... After this relationship ended i decided to give up wanting to be loved until...

Wayne 5th partner

I met wayne through a local friend and he was originally my one night stand excep[t next day i couldnt say goodbye.. He is 8 years older than me and after we got into a relationship i said to him.. Babes ya know what??? Your my partner not my possession.. I am not gonna control yab treat ya like shit etc but if ya do something ya shouldnt i will go mad.. Well i got his drinking right down to 2/3 times a month from every night and have got him off smoking.. We have been together for three years and still going strong. We have our little bicker moments but as well as doing the same job we still look out for one another... I have been screamed at by him and also screamed back at him for doing wrong doings etc but love is blind when it comes to abusive partners and wayne and dan were the only two that didnt play with my emotions

Babes when you meet someone next time the first time they treat you shit you tell em that ya aint there to take that and its dis respectful ya dont treat em like shit and they dont treat u like it either.. Partners dont abuse one another if ya love one another truely.. I know if my partner got aggressive with me id end up taking the beating because its what ive been used to but i know after someone gave my boyfriend vodka and he turned very vicious i had to throw him onto a bed and shout go to fucking bed NOW

This worked and he slept it off so i forgave him but in the long wrong partners are not there as punch bags and i have told my friends if their partners ever attacked em id be out to get their partners back as i protect my mates 100%


In a person try to find the ones who are willing to treat you like a partner not a punchbag babes
kindest regards babes

zeon

Wow, you've really had a terrible time, I'm sorry to hear about all that's happened to you.
I'm really glad that you did find someone in the end.

Thank you very much for the advice. ^^

Never again, that was a hard lesson learned. There's a vague and hard to define path from a really bad attitude towards you to throwing you into the wall and breaking your jaw, and you don't realise where it's going until it's too late and too far gone.

So no, never again, if a guy treats me like shit, then it's over before it starts. Some mistakes are too bad to make twice.

Ky xx

It's horrible that it happened at all. D:

[Woolfe]

Such, as they say, is life.

Ky x

[zeon]

Thats good advice ky.. I am witnessing an abusive relationship from an outsider with the lodgers except that they are both doing it to one another.. I dont know why its going like that but they constantly bicker i mean last night they had a massive full blown argument because the light wasnt on and neither were willing to turn the light on

[Woolfe]

Sounds like a generally unhappy marriage, where they're so unhappy with each other that anything at-all can trigger the frustrations from unhappiness into a full raging fight.

I'm guessing one or both of them also punch/kick the walls or something to avoid hitting each other? Or are they physically violent too each other too?

Really don't envy you even being the outsider, it's bad even to watch. =/

Ky xx

[zeon]

Hi KY,
I know when they first moved into the room next to mine they were at each others throats one night and then smashed a laptop and put a whole in the wall but the laptop in a million pieces and the whole bigger than nothing else they chilled down but recently started again the problem is... One is lazy and the other is doing all the work and its aqward and annoying

kindest regards

zeon x

[Woolfe]

Only thing I can see you being able to do is to say to them about trying to keep the fights down when in the flat for noise and damage reasons.

Not really a lot you can do about the relationship, you're not a marriage guidance counsellor and unless you're also friends with them, then it's not really the kinda thing you can bring up.

Good luck with it though. =]

Ky xx

[zeon]

hehe i speaqk my mind to em like i did last nite when they refused to wash up their stuff i told em wash it up or sleep in it with the water choice is urs... I aint suffering for your selfishness.. Another thing i hate about them arguing which ive bought up being a protective "dad" is my little dog doesnt like arguing and has restless nights as he worries about it i think for some reason

[JoeyJoJo]

I guess maybe I do.
It wasn't about neglect, however. For me, it was TOO MUCH attention. I felt smothered. The boyfriend prior to my current boyfriend had major control issues. He was the one I mentioned in the other thread -- the one who threatened to call the cops on me.
But maybe I've overcome these issues..... my current boyfriend is kind and understanding.

[xxxj1985xxx]

Hell no I won't put up with that Cr***p. The guy will treat me great, or else I'll leave him.

2 Reasons:
-After watching the way my dad treated my mom while growing up and watching her put up with it.
Used to fear that I'd be like him in a relationship til after seeing how I was with my ex bf.

-Used to kind of date an alcoholic. We were never officially boyfriends because he was too much of a wimp to date a guy.
He was very sweet when he was sober, but as soon as he started drinking he turned into a horses a**ss lol. Now because of him I won't date Alcoholics or heavy drinkers, partiers, drug users, etc. Tends to be hard to find a guy who's not a heavy drinker. We can go to a bar and drink, or go to a party. But only occasionally, and I don't mean occasionally turning into once a week, etc. lol.

[toomuch45]

im very sorry bout that but i wouldent fall for guys who treat me like that