Advice on seeking people online

[TonyAndonuts]

So, since it's not exactly the easiest thing in the world to just find another gay/bi guy out in public, I feel like the best option is using an app or online dating. I've found that a majority of people in my area use online dating. A few use apps, but I've found many more on dating sites. But since I'm incredibly new to dating and even seeking people out, I'm not exactly sure how to go about it. One question I have is, if you start a conversation with someone about common interests (in my case, video games), does that send the message that you're interested in them as just a friend or potentially more? I really have no idea how to flirt because I fear that I'll sound like a creep, so I tend to just be friendly. Also, if I'm talking to someone and they suddenly stop replying, should I try sending them another message to get them talking again or will that make them think I'm being too desperate or something? Because I don't know if they stopped because the conversation hit a wall and they don't know how to respond or if they're simply not that interested.

[Borg69]

Flirting is a skill that needs developed and practice... but I'm guessing your biggest fear is putting yourself out there and saying, "Hey... you're hot!" and it not being reciprocated back. You don't lose anything by giving a compliment. You won't gain anything by not taking chances and being scared of rejection.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

My Advice:

Don't do it, it won't end well.

[Lexington]

Talking - both conversing and flirting - online IS a skill, much like any other. And sadly, like most people, you learn by doing.

I don't think there's any set rules for talking online, but my guess if you approach somebody and say something like "I see you're into video games - what sort of games do you like?", you'd come across as somebody who would like to establish something of a connection before proceeding anywhere. Otherwise, you'd just say "I want you to fuck me. Let's meet up."

Lex

[Cinestry]

I'd also say don't do it. It seems like an easy way to socialise, but people online tend to feel like they can say and do whatever they want, things they would never have the balls for in real life, which makes 80% of the people on online datingsites rude bastards.
Of course you can be lucky and find some of the nice and sincere people, but I believe the chances are slim.

[TonyAndonuts]

So far, I've talked to a guy who seems genuinely nice and we had a pretty good conversation about video games. He seems like a guy I'd like to hang out with and play games with.....and maybe cuddle >_>

[Bowyn Aerrow]

So far, I've talked to a guy who seems genuinely nice and we had a pretty good conversation about video games. He seems like a guy I'd like to hang out with and play games with.....and maybe cuddle >_>

Give it a couple/few weeks then report back to us.

Few people on line are sincere, honest, trustworthy or actually playing by the rules of society.

I suggest you start off with looking up 'Cat-fish': https://www.google.com/?gws_rd=ssl#q=catfish+internet

A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they're not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances.

Source: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=catfish

And I can tell you from personal experience there are psychopaths/sociopaths who love nothing more than to 'troll' people, and they get pretty dedicated to playing out this story to cause pain/hurt/misery.

Then you have the normal people. Those who are way to fucking picky and have all sorts of conditions they want out of a friend/mate/partner. They start off playing like 'Oh I'm not shallow/perv/____________(fill in the blank with some issue)' then turn around and end up dropping you like yester-gay's news once they decide your eyes are to close together, or that a minor problem you have is 'drama' or some other bullshit.

The internet is not your friends, all of those face book buddies are not your Friends, all those twits on twitter, not your friends.

Grind'r is for fining hook-ups for sex only. And let me tell you, guys are desperate enough to want to 'score' sex with you that they will lie, cheat, steal and perhaps even commit murder if they can 'bag' you and add a notch to their bedpost.

This isn't to say that there are not a few nice guys out there on the net - However there are far too few nice guys and way to many sick/twisted/insane monsters that use the internet to collect victims and leave behind pools of tears for shits and giggles.

[Lexington]

It's easy to immediately start filling in the blanks (what you don't know about him) with what you'd like him to be like. But just keep the conversation going. If it keeps going well, and he lives nearby, feel free to meet for a coffee or a drink.

I met this guy while playing online video games once, and he decided to come visit me. How'd it go? Pretty well - he's still here seventeen years later.

Lex