I want to date a disabled man, am I crazy?

[ShiftyNJ]

The OP wasn't about dating a great guy who happens to be living with a disability. It was about deliberately seeking out people with disabilities to date with the assumption that they'd be less picky.

[Pyromancer]

The OP wasn't about dating a great guy who happens to be living with a disability. It was about deliberately seeking out people with disabilities to date with the assumption that they'd be less picky.

Yeah...and what really got to me is that no matter how people tried to explain it, the OP couldn't seem to understand how utterly condescending and disrespectful he was being. He basically said that he wanted to date a disabled person because he assumed they'd be so grateful for any crumb of attention that they wouldn't think of leaving him. UGH...

[subdivisions]

I agree with pretty much what everyone else said. I just have something to add.

I was on a dating site, and came across a profile of a guy who was disabled and in a wheelchair. I messaged him, but not because of that- I thought he was cute and I liked what he wrote in his profile. Same reason I message other guys.

It said he read my message but he didn't reply. He saw something about me that he wasn't interested in. Same as other guys.

Handicapped guys aren't desperate. They won't just jump on the first dick they see. They may be more open-minded due to their circumstances, but they still have preferences like we all do. Don't consider yourself a blessing to them. We're all equal in the dating pool here.

[JCasey]

FWIW: Slender Asian guys are a fetish classification of their own. The key is for you to find someone who likes YOU for who you are as a person.

Finding someone special isn't easy regardless of your sexuality, but it is more difficult for queer folk because so few people are comfortable embracing their place in the sexuality spectrum.

[TigerLover]

There's one big question you have to ask yourself.
Why do I want a disabled boyfriend?

Your motivations determine whether what your sking for is immoral or not.
As for where you find them..... do yourself a favor and don't show up at a disability association and start hitting people that would not go well.

[RevChasBM]

Wow... I would not call your thought process abnormal, but I would say it is a bit sad. Basically you are saying, "Maybe I can find someone is I specifically look for those who probably have a much more difficult time finding someone themselves." I have been with my partner for 14 years. I dated MANY, MANY guys over the years. I had a couple of LTR's that lasted a year or two and a great number that lasted a few months or so. It is all part of the process. When you see people who are in successful Long Term relationships, it is not because love "came easy" for them, but rather it is more likely because they were mature enough to handle it and willing to make all the hard choices that come with such a commitment. As a pastor in the LGBT community who has also pastored for years in the "mainstream" church, I can tell you that just because people say they want love and commitment, this does not mean they are at a place in their lives that they can actually handle it. Truth is, we spend more time preparing a meal than we do preparing for a healthy committed relationship. Work on yourself a bit. Sounds to me like you have a questionable self image. Geeky, Skinny, Ugly, Pretty, Asian, etc... The truth is, there really is someone out there for everyone. Some guy would be crazy about a guy JUST LIKE YOU. But real love does not come easy to anyone. Our life circumstances and past have a huge impact on how well we are able to finction in relationships. I strongly recommend a book called, "Permanent Partners: Building Gay & Lesbian Relationships That Last" It is available on Amazon. Buy it. Read it. And see if working on readying yourself for a strong and successful relationship doesn't affect the way you approach dating and finding love. God bless! (Hope this helps!)

[thawoods]

what? nothing wrong with that ..... as long he's good looking .....

[deltalover4]

At your/our age, it's too soon to throw in the towel and say you'll pick just about anybody to say that you're with somebody. And that's what you're saying when you think about dating disabled people. Disabled people are just like we are, so if you find someone that you connect with, go for it, but do not go looking for disabled people because it'll make you feel better about your difficult situation.

[InbetweenDreams]

I think many attempts were made to reach Allen...clearly way too young, ignorant and probably too impatient about dating someone. Sounds like this person doesn't realize how offensive he is. I mean do fat people not want to date a cute handsome guy? Why would anyone want anything less out of life because the circumstances they're in? I think Allen needs to do some soul searching because here I think how someone looks may not be the reason he isn't able to find someone to date, it is his immaturity. However, I still would expect more from someone who is around 25 years old.