I have had to tell a number of straight guys that their actions/words could be misconstrued as flirting by other people. I don't accuse them of flirting, but make them aware that it is noticable, and could become a problem for them. I tell them that I am gay, but I am either not attracted to them, or am not willing to be involved with married people. It is that simple.
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This is a very sticky situation because I've had in my years of employment several situations such as yours. I remember this one guy whose situation was very similar to yours. However, this I did not find out until later on. He and I were very cool with each other at work and even went out for drinks sometimes after work. He was very handsome and a football jock and he was married. However, one morning, I had gotten to the office very early and no one was there ...or so I thought and I was in the men's room and then this guy came in. We started a little conversation and while I was at the mirror brushing my hair...he took the brush out of my hand and started brushing my hair himself. He then gave the brush back to me but when he did ...he grabbed my close and started kissing me and pulling me in tighter. This went on for about two minutes and I felt his bulge hard and grinding up against mine. I immediately pulled away and told him I'm sorry but I can't do this. Later on, after hours...I was still at the job finishing up a project and come to find out..he was still there as well. Although, I was leaving..he called me into his office and closed the door and apologized for his actions earlier. He then told me that he had a crush on me and although he is married...he thinks about me all the time and is willing to leave his family if I would have him and felt the same way. I told him that I did not want any parts of that and he need to fix his relationship with his wife because nothing can happen between us. He honored my feelings and nothing else ever occurred between us but him being cordial and respectful whenever we came in contact with each other. With that being said...its not a good idea to have this at the workplace.
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