relationship advice

[jas2595]

Hi, i know this is long but I'm worried and fearing the worst, i would just like some help, and someone who can maybe relate to this and help.

Im in a relationship, and have been for a year and a half, we have had our little tiffs, but recently they have been a lot more frequent, I'm not sure if its just me, or he isn't that much into me anymore. this is my first real relationship i have had and i don't want it to end but I'm worried.
sometimes during sex i feel like he isn't that much into it, by what i mean is that i feel like I'm having to do all he work, I'm the one that starts it every time, he never comes on to me and it takes him ages to orgasm (is it my technique, of does he just not enjoying fucking me even though he is a top). when we text all we ask is how our days went and "i love you" text, never anything more. he is away at the moment for work and won't becoming home for a couple more days, i sent him messages everyday saying "thinking of you" or i love you" and asking him stuff to get a conversation rolling" on whatsspp, knowing that he won't reply till later into the dasy but i notice that he comes online but never replies to my texts but always to a work mate (which i know he is cheating on me with him). if he ever does reply its a i love you, or a one word reply "yeah" to the question are you okay. after that he dent reply for ages.

i only see him once or twice a week due to work. but I'm finding hard because i feel like sometimes there is just no communication between sometimes and very few intimate moments, like kissing, I'm always the one that has to go into a kiss or a hug.

is it me ?? i just don't understand

[Darius]

I hate to say it, but I think it is you. You are being a doormat to someone who treats you badly. Why would you put up with his cheating? Do you really expect it to improve?

I'm sorry for what is happening to you and I can tell you are in pain. Sometimes you have to do the hard thing to get better. Do you think it's time to dump him?

[Lexington]

"...always to a work mate (which i know he is cheating on me with him)...."

You seem awfully nonchalant about this. Is he really cheating on you? Is he honest about it?

I'd say it's time for a long talk. When he gets home. Lay out your concerns, and ask if he's interested in rekindling the relationship.

Lex

[Pyromancer]

If you're in an open relationship, then how can he be cheating?

Before venturing a reply...Have things always been this way between you, or have they changed for the worse? If so, when? It would help to have a bit of perspective on the situation...Was it different at first?

[phillyboy1234]

Im in a relationship, and have been for a year and a half, we have had our little tiffs, but recently they have been a lot more frequent, I'm not sure if its just me, or he isn't that much into me anymore. this is my first real relationship i have had and i don't want it to end but I'm worried.

Just curious, but how old are you? Are you his first relationship? How did you meet?

sometimes during sex i feel like he isn't that much into it

It sounds as if you are letting him use you to get off. Do you enjoy it? Some guys enjoy being submissive, but you give the impression that rather than submissive, you spend your time during sex worried that he isn't enjoying it. I would feel terrible if when I had sex, my only concern was if my man was enjoying it. Just to consider: if during sex my main focus is to worry about whether he is into me, when how would I feel when we aren't having sex and those carefree endorphins aren't flowing?

when we text

You mention texting a lot. Texting can be a great way to keep in touch at times when you can't otherwise talk. But it can also become a burden. Don't get me wrong, it is nice to know that someone wants to talk to you and to hear from you, but after while it feels like being smothered.

...a work mate (which i know he is cheating on me with him).

I put this quote last because it answers everything, regardless of whether he is truly cheating. If he is cheating, then end it. He has broken that trust of a relationship, and with your concerns above it really seems like time to move on. If he isn't cheating but you suspect it, why is it that you suspect it? And, if you have thought about it so long that you suspect it, don't you think that says enough?