Hi I need your advice please :)

[Rosinante]

I feel like I am incapable of loving someone. So much that I begining to question my sexually.. "Am I really gay?" I hated that question that pops up in my mind.

I mean.. I have had sex with men (5 times) and i love it. I get aroused and everything.. I don't regret.. I mean I LOVE making out with men. And I have had crushes and attraction.

As for woman.. They don't even pop up in my head lol.. I mean here and there they do but my brain points to MENNNNN.

I suffer from depression and Anxiety. And i don't know if that's what's Making me feel this way.

I just need some advice.. Or something someone who understands me.

[Pyromancer]

There seems to be a lot that you're leaving out. Why do you feel that you're incapable of love? Do you mean that you fear you're incapable of loving another man, or just incapable of love in general...have you felt love for your parents, siblings, friends?

How do you define love?

You and I are the same age, so I'm not going to tell you that it's because you're young lol...When you say that you've suffered depression...do you mean just a persistent low mood or true clinical depression? Are you depressed now?

Sorry to be answering questions with questions lol, but knowing this stuff would help...and, BTW, from what you've written I think we can reasonably assume that you're gay...sexual attraction/orientation and love are two different things...

[Borg69]

The depression makes you feel worthless. Feeling worthless makes you feel like there's no way anyone could love you, hence you turn it around and project that you won't (or cannot) love them either.

Love and sex are in many ways separate emotions... often times, even while depressed one can still feel the urges of lust, without the accompanying emotions of intimacy/love/affection.

Get help for the depression.

[Rareboy]

It is the depression.

Hopefully you are being treated for it.

You are capable of loving and being loved....but depression and anxiety can throw up barriers to this...and sometimes the meds you may be taking can as well.

Talk to a counsellor about this.

[SteeveMonarch]

I've had a depression too and felt this way. No love for anyone including myself. When we don'T love ourselves we can't love other people. Take care of yourself and love yourself!

[Lexington]

Your brain is giving you some bad info right now - that's sort of what depression is all about. And part of that group of misinformation is feeling unlovable, or incapable of loving/being loved. Keep tackling that depression, and you'll eventually get beyond that feeling.

Lex

[Bhp91126]

I've had a depression too and felt this way. No love for anyone including myself. When we don'T love ourselves we can't love other people. Take care of yourself and love yourself!

Exactly that. Been there myself. Get help/therapy!

And for the time being, maybe you are able to make good friends.

[Bricg1970]

Love is a strange emotion, when you are not after it come, can also build or can be away when you most need it. So if it is because you are depressed look for help or find something to take you out of the low moods, great you are sharing your thoughts , that's a start

[MikeW]

I feel like I am incapable of loving someone. So much that I begining to question my sexually.. "Am I really gay?"

Welcome to GaySpeak! You're getting a lot of good replies but if no one quotes you, you might not know that. I encourage you to keep coming back and hanging out with us when you have nothing better to do. Read through some of the other threads. Feel free to start other topics of your own. What you're dealing with is VERY common. I see it here (and on other gay forums) a lot. Young gay men who are still trying to come to terms with themselves, their feelings, and their place in society. IT ISN'T EASY -- especially to begin with. It is about self-acceptance and it is a gradual process because there is SO LITTLE in the world around us that help us understand and accept ourselves. For straight young men it is different. Certain things are just "taken for granted" as "being the way things are" ... the whole of society is set up so they can find their niche. For us it is different. Society doesn't give us positive roles let alone positive role models. So we often feel lost, unsure of ourselves, like we don't "belong."

Well, you do belong here at the very least! Try not to worry overly much about whether or not you can "love". Yes, you can. But it may take a while for you to find your love and willingness to express and share it.

[Rosinante]

There seems to be a lot that you're leaving out. Why do you feel that you're incapable of love? Do you mean that you fear you're incapable of loving another man, or just incapable of love in general...have you felt love for your parents, siblings, friends?

How do you define love?

You and I are the same age, so I'm not going to tell you that it's because you're young lol...When you say that you've suffered depression...do you mean just a persistent low mood or true clinical depression? Are you depressed now?

Sorry to be answering questions with questions lol, but knowing this stuff would help...and, BTW, from what you've written I think we can reasonably assume that you're gay...sexual attraction/orientation and love are two different things...

I mean for another man.

Also I suffer from clinical depression. I take meds, but they do not work. I am afraid if I go on new meds.. They will destroy my sex drive.

Right now.. My depression has taken the majority of my energy. I am always sleepy. I am always irritated and can be easily angered.