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I Married A Moron
#21
Beaux Wrote:I KNOW that I NEED to do what Ipis best for me, but I can't help it: I feel sorry for him! Sad
What? Is? WRONG WITH ME????x

Nothing. You're just human. You may think about all the invesments you've made.

But it's not worth it. Not anymore and you know it.

This is a proper time to be selfish and think about your well being. He will have to deal with the consequences of his own actions.

Bighug
[Image: 05onfire1_xp-jumbo-v2.jpg?quality=90&auto=webp]
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#22
Why not just leave ? after a certain amount of time cant you be granted a divorce whether he wants one or not ? im no lawyer obviously lol ... surely you would be entitled to your share even if you left ,also if you met someone else then why would he then want to stay married....although spite is a good reason for some people
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#23
matty7 Wrote:Why not just leave ? after a certain amount of time cant you be granted a divorce whether he wants one or not ? im no lawyer obviously lol ... surely you would be entitled to your share even if you left ,also if you met someone else then why would he then want to stay married....although spite is a good reason for some people

It isn't quite as simple as just leaving. At least not in this state. If I leave before finding for divorce, it is considered abandonment. To actually file for divorce, he has to be served and given the chance to respond. He has already told me that he doesn't want a divorce, so that means 3-6 more months living together afte that (judges discretion).
Trust. I have looked into this.
~Beaux
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#24
sometimes a little separation is good to find the spark in a relationship again
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#25
Wow, you sacrificed all that for him and he STILL blamed you?! Just wow.

It is natural for you to feel sorry for him, you are a caring, decent person who has been through a lot with this man, and surely many good, loving times in the past. So it is natural for you to feel sorry for him in some way.

BUT...

You need to start thinking of yourself now. You have put up with this for long enough. Nothing is changing. You and him have seeked help, and with every attempt, he has thrown it back in your face. I think you know what you need to do here.

But what a shitty situation for you to be going through Sad. So again, have another one of these Bighug xx
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#26
Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad

Carl just informed me that he has decided NOT to go to Louisiana for Christmas......he is staying here...with me....😩😩😥😥😪😪😪😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😪😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

~Beaux
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#27
Beaux, you sound like a very nice and caring man. You have a heart of gold. Unfortunately that means people are going to step all over you. Don't let that change you though, It's a tough to never be appreciated, but selfless is it's own reward, even if you have to sacrifice.

That being said, it appears you are in an abusive relationship. Words and actions hurt just as much as physical violence can, sometimes more.

I'm not going to pretend I know whats best for you, because only you know that.

You do however, deserve better. I hope you find your way out and get to let all this stress go.

In the meantime, Merry Christmas, and and hopefully his staying home doesn't ruin all of your happiness.
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#28
Beaux do you have any friends who wouldn't mind having you over for Christmas? Preferably that the husband doesn't know the address of?
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#29
Beaux, it sounds like you may have gotten through to him, at least temporarily. Try to take a tough but very calm stand. Insist that the problems have to be dealt with head on. Good luck, man. I think of you daily.
I bid NO Trump!
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#30
LJay Wrote:Beaux, it sounds like you may have gotten through to him, at least temporarily. Try to take a tough but very calm stand. Insist that the problems have to be dealt with head on. Good luck, man. I think of you daily.

No...I didn't "get through" to him. More of his many iTunes charges came through on the debit card account and left too little in the bank for him to make the trip....
When he first realized what had happened, he tried to (yet again) blame me for it, but I was having none of it...I told him the only person he can blame is himself... Now he is back to moping and pouting....
~Beaux
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