We broke up but we still live together and treat like partners. Is it ok?

[LONDONER]

I don't pay half of his mortgage. Pay rent and half of the utilities and I pay for cable

If you pay that then all the more reason to move out albeit temporarily, to a small, modest studio apartment until you can afford to buy yourself a place. You shouldn't put up with his crap and longer.

[Shooter]

He is the type of person that never forgives and forgets. He remembers and gets bitter and mad when he talks about things his exes did to him.

....and now you're one of his exes. And if he's the type who won't accept an apology over something you said, prepare to become a punching bag.

What on earth did you say to him that he finds so unforgivable? Did you put a voodoo curse on him or something? And I'm not sure there's such a thing as a "wrong" thing to say during an argument. Arguments are by nature a sort of "anything goes" situation. We say stupid or hurtful things out of anger. If you said something vicious and mean right out of the blue at the breakfast table one morning, that might need some explaining. But for God's sake, it was an argument. There are few rules in arguments. I can see him holding a grudge over something you did, but he needs to forgive you if all you did was run your mouth.

He sounds a little old to be so angry and vindictive. Plus he's mourning his brother's death. It's not going to get any easier for you.

Like I said, I was in a similar situation. Staying was easy because I wanted him back. I figured there might be a better chance of that if I was still around. Plus, staying made me feel secure. If I was to move out, it would have been like finalizing the breakup and I wasn't ready to do that.

I really suggest you think about leaving. Get your own place where you don't have to hide out in your own home. The longer you stay in this situation, the longer it will eat at you, and it will take longer for you to get back on your feet emotionally when it finally all ends for good, which it eventually will.

I know that sounds hard, but I have little doubt that it's the best thing for you. You have to be true to yourself and move on with your life.

[kindy64]

I was in my hetero marriage for 15 years longer than I should have been because I feared the alternatives. Being alone, dating again, my inability to stick to a spending plan. So I put up with my own misery and didn't put any effort into the situation. Putting up with the situation I had was "easier" than jumping into the unknown. 2014 I finally bit the bullet and threw my life into a wood chipper (the alternative at the time was to actually bite a bullet.)

I may not be as happy as I want to be, but I am living far more authentically. Being who I want to be. Gained a loving 20 year old man in the process.

I agree with the above advice, you should really separate yourself from this situation.

Your ex-partner holds grudges and never forgets. Well, whatever you said must have been a doozy, 'cause there's nothing my boyfriend could say to me to make me stop loving him. Yeah, I might get angry and upset about something he says, but I stew over it, we talk about it, and we get over it. We grow because of it. At 58, this is something your ex-partner should have learned and absorbed.

[East]

Agreeing with [MENTION=20941]Camfer[/MENTION] as I remember the saga ....

...and the one thing that stands out to me that is different this time..so glad you are saving money and making plans to be move along....

As for your situation....you can only beat a dead horse with a stick so many times before your arms gets tired?...(or falls off!)....

Best of luck to you

[Insertnamehere]

Unless there is some difficult financial situation going one, by all means get the hell out of there.

You are staying because you are still into him, but you guys broke up. He seesm to have that clear and now it's time for you to have it clear too.

Move out. It won't do you any good to stay there.

[Darius]

Is he willing to maintain a friendship with you? Are you willing to settle for that?
He has shown you with his words and actions that he holds grudges and never forgives. This should show you that there is no hope for a romantic relationship.

[Zurdoknoc]

He is Wilking to maintain friendship with me that's for sure. Living with an ex is not easy. However I must do it to save money to buy my own place. Is also convenient for him
Since I pay half of the bills Except the mortgage. He acts like nothing happened and that confuses me. He cooks on the weekends. We end up having dinner at the patio and chatting all night long. Watching tv together or sometimes taking briefly on the phone. From my point of view you don't do that for a roommate. We will see what happens. This weekend I will try to go out to the movies alone to avoid the "let's have dinner together"