Rockin80 Wrote:I've been having this compulsion for black man since I was 20, I'm 36 now. I cannot help myself, if I'm feeling horny and want to engage in hookup from an app I'll always go for the blacks, even though I like white guys as well.
I was recently diagnosed with chronic depression and this compulsion might have to do with it.
Having attraction for black men is normal. Having a compulsion, on the other hand....
Compulsion: Are you certain?
Men typically know what they want and what trips their breakers. An attraction, desire to be with a black man is no different than an attraction/desire to be with a man with lots of body hair, or none, lots of muscle, or none...
Attraction is formed from many factors, but usually from meeting a charming individual who becomes your ruler by which you measure all other men.
EXAMPLE 1: I like black men, and because of a previous relationship with a black man that was totally awesome, until the end, I have this personal desire for a black man for another relationship.
EXAMPLE 2: My moma was a black man. To be more precise, the first person to show me true maternal instinct was a black cross dresser. Between her and her husband (another black man) I formed certain strong emotional positive feelings for blacks.
There are also negative factors that affect desire.
EXAMPLE: I'm sorta turned off now by muscles, especially 6 packs. This has more to deal with the fact that more men with 6 packs have beaten the crap out of me (abuse) leading me to shy away from guys with 6 packs... no, more precisely I find 6 packs a total turn off, and when I see a guy with them I have strong judgements of their character based on my past.
My examples are my personal experiences that have formed my ideals and notions about individuals of X factor.
I'm betting that there are experiences you have had that have lead to your desire. And I suspect that your "compulsion" is not compulsive, but a lonely heart aching for something to fill the hole there. - Yeah, Yeah, there is a joke in that.
I'm further willing to bet that should you meet the right black man who rocks your world and it needs to be rocked, that you will form a close bond with him, have a good to great relationship and a desire to be with other black men will not feel like compulsion, but feel like normal attraction.