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Says he isn't interested
#11
It's okay to spoil a friend/partner/companion a bit. Men tend to do that with persons they are sexually attracted to, to a greater or lesser degree, depending on their constitution and character. However, you have to keep yourself anchored to reality at the same time. Don't overdo it, there's got to be a balance.

As for the rest of it, from what you've said it does not seem that he reciprocates your interest. It seems to be a more casual thing for him. For that reason, I wouldn't get attached to him. It's fine to mess around, but I'd look elsewhere for depth and feeling. The ball is in his court. He knows he has a chance with you, so if he wants it he knows to do something about it.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
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#12
metalmikey Wrote:I have often thought since the sex stopped, what is going on. As we seen eachother daily, he'd come by after work and I would make his dinner for him and we'd just hang out. There are many things we do besides sex I class him as a good friend though I like him more so than that. We've climbed mountains, gone the cinema, usual things really. Recently his work moved area, so he doesn't pass mine now after work. And he has not came to see me at all. So I am beginning to think as most you say, was he using me to be fed, and be nice to get the odd gift. Since he doesn't pass mine now he'd be going out of his way from where he lives. Another thing is he will not do anything with me with his friends, friends which I also know, but he will not want me there.

If I care about someone, I'm fine with going out of my way a bit to be able to see him or her. If he won't even do that, it makes me wonder how much he actually cares about seeing you.

The other thing, not being willing to do anything with you and his/your friends. I recently had a guy act that way, and it was because he was afraid that they'd think he was gay too. You deserve a guy who'll be happy to go out of his way to see you, and proud to have friends see him with you.
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#13
I really hate this kind of motherf*ckers... sorry if I sounded mean but it's true.

You know this dude is just one of the typical "I can't accept myself, or I'm processing this too slow so keep calm" kind of. I don't know about you but I don't really have patience for this kind of dudes. If you didn't notice, the way he treats you is completely egoistic or selfish.

Maybe he's not really playing with you intentionally but... meh, you will know if you will accept this thing or not.
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#14
I am in a similar position with the man you described,however i cant even see myself in action, i cant imagine nor dream about it,if he can go far(how far u guys go in bedroom)when does he stop?if you are able to seal the deal he is using you,if he cant do that, he is just not ready for relationship and you shouldnt push him for that,if you push him for that,he might accept himself or become more familiar with being gay, but that would happen in a picture where you are not anymore a part of it ,he would stop any connection.Thats what i think, he is not ready,and i cant even understand how can you met with him,how did u met and how did he let you become that close ?I cant see that happening,hmm i think it all depends on this

1-how far does he can go during sex?

2-is he comfortable with being treated extremely nice like the one and only with gifts etc(i wouldnt like that thing,it would bore and sick me,)i would like to rather have a distance relationship where each one has to act like they are not that close to each other( and watch themselves,you said that you are close friends)

Hmm if the first answer is yes he can do anything and everything and the second one is he likes
I think he is using you

If not ,i dont think you are gonna become his one and only, you are just going to be a memorable brick in a building with helping him(being more familiar with being gay)

Either way you should stop talking to him
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#15
Just a little update. I can't believe I got this guy so wrong. A convo we recently had:

I like you a lot Jack, and I want more than this secret relationship. I understand how you are, and I have been very patient. You make me happy, you’ve taught me so much. I respect you and I will always be there for you.

Mikey, you know that I can’t be the person you need. Bi curious just isn’t the same as you. I don’t get off to gay porn for instance. I don’t see guys like you do. I do dream of girls and not you at night. I get choked up and not know what to say to pretty girls because they do that thing with the eyes they do. My dreams are full of meadows holding hands with my dream girl. Sex with you is just sex. I’m just not gay.
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#16
metalmikey Wrote:Just a little update. I can't believe I got this guy so wrong. A convo we recently had:

I like you a lot Jack, and I want more than this secret relationship. I understand how you are, and I have been very patient. You make me happy, you’ve taught me so much. I respect you and I will always be there for you.

Mikey, you know that I can’t be the person you need. Bi curious just isn’t the same as you. I don’t get off to gay porn for instance. I don’t see guys like you do. I do dream of girls and not you at night. I get choked up and not know what to say to pretty girls because they do that thing with the eyes they do. My dreams are full of meadows holding hands with my dream girl. Sex with you is just sex. I’m just not gay.

I an so sorry that This has happened. You need to find some one who will love and wants to be with you.
An eye for an eye
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#17
Okay, so he's finally being honest with you. I know it hurts to hear it. But you know where you stand now. He should have been honest with you from day one and not used you to satisfy his curiosity and to get what he could.

I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but I avoid bi-curious guys and guys who intend to remain closeted like the plague. Because I don't want to get hurt. I don't want to get attached to someone who will never reciprocate my feelings, who wants to "experiment" with me or who wants to keep me his dirty
little secret.

You sound like a really nice guy, and I'm sorry that he hurt you this way. Hard as it may seem, it's time to move on. This guy is a total dead end. There are guys out there who'll treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Hang in there, good stuff really does happen!
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#18
It comes with the territory that a lot of the men you like are straight. There's no avoiding that. Now you know for sure about him, there's no future with this guy. Let him go, and find someone who can reciprocate.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
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#19
Gemini Wrote:Okay, so he's finally being honest with you. I know it hurts to hear it. But you know where you stand now. He should have been honest with you from day one and not used you to satisfy his curiosity and to get what he could.

I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but I avoid bi-curious guys and guys who intend to remain closeted like the plague. Because I don't want to get hurt. I don't want to get attached to someone who will never reciprocate my feelings, who wants to "experiment" with me or who wants to keep me his dirty
little secret.

You sound like a really nice guy, and I'm sorry that he hurt you this way. Hard as it may seem, it's time to move on. This guy is a total dead end. There are guys out there who'll treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Hang in there, good stuff really does happen!

+1 Gemini.
I too am not interested in Bi Guys. I want a guy that is interested in me not some chick.

metalmikey - sorry to hear that bud, that sucks. But keep on looking. You'll find the right guy eventually.
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