Well, I believe his philosophy is that straight men don't have anal sex even with females so the only "shit pushers" are gays.
I think he really believes in what he says, he never does anything just because everyone else does. His parents are homophobic so I guess they raised him that way. My parents are homophobic too and if I wasn't gay myself I'd probably be just like majority of Russian guys - screaming that fags need to be killed.
It's not that easy to drop someone that your family knows very well and I don't see how moving to another group of people would help because they'll more likely also be homophobic. In my 20 years of age, I've never met one person in St Petersburg who wouldn't talk bad about gays. It would only work if I moved to another country but I cannot do that now. Next year I plan on maybe getting in an exchange program and travel to another country through it.
cormeum Wrote:Well, I believe his philosophy is that straight men don't have anal sex even with females so the only "shit pushers" are gays.
I think he really believes in what he says, he never does anything just because everyone else does. His parents are homophobic so I guess they raised him that way. My parents are homophobic too and if I wasn't gay myself I'd probably be just like majority of Russian guys - screaming that fags need to be killed.
It's not that easy to drop someone that your family knows very well and I don't see how moving to another group of people would help because they'll more likely also be homophobic. In my 20 years of age, I've never met one person in St Petersburg who wouldn't talk bad about gays. It would only work if I moved to another country but I cannot do that now. Next year I plan on maybe getting in an exchange program and travel to another country through it.
Yes, you should do that, and then try to find a way to defect.
cormeum Wrote:Well, I believe his philosophy is that straight men don't have anal sex even with females so the only "shit pushers" are gays.
I think he really believes in what he says, he never does anything just because everyone else does. His parents are homophobic so I guess they raised him that way. My parents are homophobic too and if I wasn't gay myself I'd probably be just like majority of Russian guys - screaming that fags need to be killed.
It's not that easy to drop someone that your family knows very well and I don't see how moving to another group of people would help because they'll more likely also be homophobic. In my 20 years of age, I've never met one person in St Petersburg who wouldn't talk bad about gays. It would only work if I moved to another country but I cannot do that now. Next year I plan on maybe getting in an exchange program and travel to another country through it.
Of course, I get it, but if I were brave enough I would challenge his thinking by asking whether he thought no heterosexuals ever engaged in anal sex, and whether he thought that ALL gays engaged in it (which we know is NOT true). And the other thing I would be asking, would be, if anal sex was so disgusting or hurtful why would anyone ever engage in it, straight or gay? There must be reasons why gays engage in it, and there must be reasons why some men want to be penetrated even with a dildo, or women for that matter. Why would they do it? In fact, we know there's a whole bunch of reasons why people engage in anal sex, including, I believe, in some cultures, men anally penetrating women to avoid pregnancies. What this shows is so much ignorance about human sexuality.
In fact you can be gay and have absolutely NO experience of sex with another person or even group sex. All you might know is your own body and your own ways of dealing with sexual frustration and outlets.
princealbertofb Wrote:In fact you can be gay and have absolutely NO experience of sex with another person or even group sex. All you might know is your own body and your own ways of dealing with sexual frustration and outlets.
But you can also be straight and have the exact same experience... Priests in the Catholic church for example, might have no sexual experience with another person or people and not necessarily be gay.
I think you need to educate your childhood 'friend'. Not everyone's a horny dog like him.
princealbertofb Wrote:And the other thing I would be asking, would be, if anal sex was so disgusting or hurtful why would anyone ever engage in it, straight or gay? There must be reasons why gays engage in it, and there must be reasons why some men want to be penetrated even with a dildo, or women for that matter. Why would they do it? In fact, we know there's a whole bunch of reasons why people engage in anal sex, including, I believe, in some cultures, men anally penetrating women to avoid pregnancies. What this shows is so much ignorance about human sexuality.
''Knowledge'' about human sexuality comes first-hand. It shows inhibition of a person's own sexual impulses (or alternatively, hypocrisy). Which here - as in most cases -- is due to the external and social environment the person is brought up/lives in.
It's also a way for a certain social class (and sexual orientation constitutes a social class by itself) to exert superiority over another (which is wholly artificial), and to justify acts of cruelty and physical harm done to people belonging to that class.
In such cases the collective environment is to blame to a huge degree (but not exclusively, because people can resist the environment according to their personality which is something they are born with), and you can only make things better by changing the environment or leaving that environment for a better one. You can also challenge the environment, but only if you have the type of character to do it.
I feel sorry for you. Actually I am really fascinated by Russian culture and always want to travel to Russia, probably due to those Russian children story books I used to read when I was small - all sorts of stories about witches, Istvan (does it spell like this? The main character of every story are always Istvan / Ivan) etc.
It's a shame most people there are homophobic, and actually, why is it like that?? How can most people in a country be homophobic?
I think it's good for you to go on exchange programme or even just move away. It's sometimes okay to be alone because it forces you to be independent and survive on your own.
4 years ago I decided to go on an exchange programme and I feel like I am a much better me than I was before that. And right now I am again living abroad all by myself. While sometimes being lonely, it gives me rooms to reflect on myself and how can I improve as a person...even though it could be tough.
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