Do your gaydars work properly?

[Zen]

C'monn guys!! Just dont argue.

We dont look for scientific evidences. it's a topic for fun and nothing would be a certain clue, but if guy buys a dildo, he probably doesnt buy it for his wife. it's possible but rarely happens I think.

You're right, she usually buys them for me!! Haha, I'm joking!

[Bookworm]

My gaydar is as transient as the weather I think :biggrin:

It's all in the eye contact for me when I'm interacting with them, but I've got my wires crossed before on many occasions! I completely misread someone I work with. I'd put him in the 'mmmmm, very nice but straight' category in my head, despite interacting with him on a daily basis. That was a major gaydar fail on my part!

I'd say I've learnt that sexuality is fluid and is not black and white. I've always known I was sexually attracted to guys yet I've found girls VERY attractive at times.

I've had a similar experience to this too, years ago, which actually made me question my own sexuality for a while. She was an amazingly pretty girl on one of my courses back at the start of my student days. She had a sort of ethereal quality about her. We sort of gravitated towards each other through a series of weird synchronicities; we loved the same books, identical tastes in music and we completely resonated with each other from the get go. It was something I'd never experienced before, and I've not experienced that level of connection with anyone since. I was still in the closet at this point and really wanted to open up to her about everything, but I didn't. We never kept in touch after the course finished either sadly. This was before the days you could track anyone down on social media.

[Zen]

My gaydar is as transient as the weather I think :biggrin:

It's all in the eye contact for me when I'm interacting with them, but I've got my wires crossed before on many occasions! I completely misread someone I work with. I'd put him in the 'mmmmm, very nice but straight' category in my head, despite interacting with him on a daily basis. That was a major gaydar fail on my part!



I've had a similar experience to this too, years ago, which actually made me question my own sexuality for a while. She was an amazingly pretty girl on one of my courses back at the start of my student days. She had a sort of ethereal quality about her. We sort of gravitated towards each other through a series of weird synchronicities; we loved the same books, identical tastes in music and we completely resonated with each other from the get go. It was something I'd never experienced before, and I've not experienced that level of connection with anyone since. I was still in the closet at this point and really wanted to open up to her about everything, but I didn't. We never kept in touch after the course finished either sadly. This was before the days you could track anyone down on social media.

She sounds like she was a great person. It's so amazing when you meet someone that you click with on different levels. I find I'm attracted to both men and women for different reasons physically, but the same reasons emotionally and spiritually. Maybe it's why we describe people as 'soul mate's' rather than 'body mates' ?

[himself]

I don't know how good a judge of gayness I am. Obviously, there are some people who are really obviously gay. Madonna may have straight male fans and some straight men may be flamboyant or talk with a 'gay accent', but if I met an effeminate man who dresses flamboyantly, is a huge fan of Madonna and loves musicals, and all his friends are women, I would assume he's gay. I wouldn't even need to think about it. What I'm saying is that you don't have to be gay to like Madonna or speak 'effeminately' or like musicals or dress flamboyantly but it's probably a lot less common for straight men to do a combination of these things. I know a lot of gays that fit the stereotype so they're not as uncommon as some gay men would like to think. Of course, the reason I know they're gay in the first place is because of their behaviour (and also because they're openly gay). I don't know how many 'straight acting' gays I know because, if someone 'acts straight', I'll probably never question their sexuality.

I think someone used, earlier in this thread, the phrase, "wishful thinking." If I'm interested in someone, I'll probably start analysing everything they do in order to convince myself that they are gay. So, if I ever had a gaydar, wishful thinking has probably messed it up.

[Marcus]

Well, thanks [MENTION=22336]himself[/MENTION] for explaining my view with better words. That's really all I meant, I see no generalisation in that.

[Marcus]

Well, thanks [MENTION=22336]himself[/MENTION], that's exactly what I meant. Perhaps my explanation wasn't quite as easy to follow as your comment, I still have to work my english, but I fail to see any generalisation in that. Anyway, I hope this useless derail stops now, it was such a nice thread before people with faulty logic jumping to wrong conclusions ruined it.

[meridannight]

It's ok if you didn't understand at first, but even after I explained myself?

In my first comment I said this:
"I can't tell if someone is gay unless it's too obvious (rainbow bracelet, madonna/gaga fanboy, overly feminine, all their friends are girls...)": did I say that a certain music taste alone makes you gay, or that if you're gay you must like a certain popstar? Or that it's the only way to know if someone is homosexual? Nope. I only meant that, from my experience, when a guy shows most/all of these traits all at once he's probably gay. So, saying "but i like rock so ur wrong" makes no sense.
Why even bring generalisation into this? Did I EVER say all gay guys are like that?
"You did claim that if a guy listens to Madonna and has female friends, then he is 100% gay. Which is not true at all."
Did I? I hate repeating myself, but I said "rainbow bracelet, madonna/gaga fanboy, overly feminine, all their friends are girls". You (conveniently?) forgot them being overly feminine and all their friends being girls. The rainbow bracelet was just a metaphor for gay themed accessories. Also, when I said "they're pretty much 100% gay" it was a manner of speaking, to say that it's highly likely. So again, thanks Mr. Obvious for pointing out that it's not actually true 100% of the time.

Maybe I could have been more clear, but some you guys definitely have problems with basic logic or so it seems.

Holy fuck, you are making this to be way more of an issue than it actually is!

did I say that a certain music taste alone makes you gay, or that if you're gay you must like a certain popstar? Or that it's the only way to know if someone is homosexual?

You were the one to bring Madonna into this conversation about gaydars and homosexuality. For what other purpose was it other than to imply a connection between them?

You seem to have missed the fact that [MENTION=24256]RomanticMan[/MENTION] replied to your quote on Madonna, that it must be a valid premise. That, and considering the fact that a percentage of the overall population does buy into that stereotype, it makes whole complete rational sense to overthrow it with examples to the contrary. You seem to not be able to follow your own conversation or put it into the wider context of the environment we're all living in.

What is your problem with people trying to clarify the matter anyway?

So, saying "but i like rock so ur wrong" makes no sense.

I can brag with my musical tastes all I want, and it doesn't have to ''make sense'' to you at all.

You brought up the musical taste in conversation. Don't go complaining when other guys start talking about what their experience is like concerning musical tastes and homosexuality. You steered the conversation toward that, and opened up the possibility for an exchange of views on it. Now you have a problem when guys do that?

Did I? I hate repeating myself, but I said "rainbow bracelet, madonna/gaga fanboy, overly feminine, all their friends are girls". You (conveniently?) forgot them being overly feminine and all their friends being girls. The rainbow bracelet was just a metaphor for gay themed accessories. Also, when I said "they're pretty much 100% gay" it was a manner of speaking, to say that it's highly likely. So again, thanks Mr. Obvious for pointing out that it's not actually true 100% of the time.

Oh, who cares what you meant to how high a decimal point value or whether all the quoted conditions must be satisfied or any! This isn't about misreading you or accusing you of labeling all gay guys under Madonna fans. I perfectly well understood from the start you didn't mean that, as I'm sure did others.

This is an open topic, for everyone to discuss, everyone to pick a point in conversation they want to discuss and then talk about it.

You're the only one who has a problem with it. Everyone else was just enjoying the conversation.

Stop being so damn pedantic. And don't go telling other people what they can or cannot talk about. Whether it makes sense to you or not is beside the point.

[Marcus]

Look, I explained my point well enough, and h.imself basically said what I meant in a few words. So I'm sorry but I'm not gonna waste my time replying to each and every point in that wall of text cause you clearly have problems understanding what I said. "Don't go telling other people what they can or cannot talk about". I never said there's something you can't do lmao see, you keep putting words in my mouth. You're free to keep misinterpreting my comments and using your faulty logic to try and prove I made a bad generalisation and blah blah blah, I just suggest you stop because nobody likes this anymore, and you're not even good at doing it.

[meridannight]

Look, I explained my point well enough, and h.imself basically said what I meant in a few words. So I'm sorry but I'm not gonna waste my time replying to each and every point in that wall of text cause you clearly have problems understanding what I said. "Don't go telling other people what they can or cannot talk about". I never said there's something you can't do lmao see, you keep putting words in my mouth. You're free to keep misinterpreting my comments and using your faulty logic to try and prove I made a bad generalisation and blah blah blah, I just suggest you stop because nobody likes this anymore, and you're not even good at doing it.

You didn't explain anything, but keep whining about details.

If you're not interested in discussing it further why keep replying to me then? Very convenient also, oh-I'm-not gonna-read-what-you-wrote-but-you're-wrong tactic. What a child! Either argue or shut up.

And don't go speaking for what others like or dislike. And I won't fucking stop, so don't even try to tell me what to do. I'll keep at it as long as I want to.

And I do this very good, in fact. Thank you very much.

[Marcus]

You call me a child, yet you're using swearwords like an angry teen. Also:
"don't go telling other people what they can or cannot talk about"
*later*
"And don't go speaking for what others like or dislike"
See? That's why I didn't bother answering to everything you said. There's nothing childish about looking down on people who contradict themselves so blatantly.