Decision has been made.

[Ammon]

About an hour ago, I asked him if he wants to keep the incubator, security camera system, some birdcages, xbox one, sony xperia m4 aqua I bought him last year that he didn't appreciate etc.

He asked why and I said "I'm selling everything that belonged to me but isn't being used."

Him: why? Are you going on vacation? (he said with a smile)
Me: Yes, for a very long time...
He simply smiled and said "no, you can sell it."

I went to my room and was resetting my xbox one.
He came to the room and asked why all these sales all of the sudden? Are planning something? At first I tried ignoring his question with saying "why do you care" and "I only need to know what you can use and what I can sell"
He kept on asking so I said just let it be, I really don't feel like arguing and getting mad and stuff. He kept smiling and saying why would there be arguing, just tell me..
Eventually I had no choice but to answer.
Me: Because from now on I'm going to take care of 'me'
Him: Oh ok
And he left the room
2 minutes later he comes back in the room closes the door and sits on top of me and said why are you like this?
And I said "don't touch me please, I'm not into it "
Him: Fine, be like that
Me: did I not warn you, you'd act like this?
Him: no it's cool
He left again, 5min later he opens the door and said" so you're not going with us? Your staying home all day? "

I said yes and he left.

For the first time I actually believed myself, meaning every word I said.

Normally when someone hurts my feelings, the moment they smile I automatically smile back and all is forgiven, but I didn't smile back this time which is really strange for me.

Now to keep this up untill I find my own place -_-

[Cridders88]

For the first time I actually believed myself, meaning every word I said.

Normally when someone hurts my feelings, the moment they smile I automatically smile back and all is forgiven, but I didn't smile back this time which is really strange for me.

Now to keep this up untill I find my own place -_-

Sounds like the actions of a man who has had enough. People can only take so much, no wonder you didn't smile back this time. I do wonder if he is going to get more and more suspicious though. Hopefully the stuff sells quickly and you don't have to drag this out too much longer.

[EvenOlderButWiser]

You mustn't feel, that because your the one making the decision to walk away, you have to walk away with nothing and leave behind all the physical things you brought into the home.

There is no need to feel guilty, and then to try and address that guilt by "gifting" him everything thats important to you. Relationship breakups don't (or shouldn't) work that way.

Finding yourself a place to stay is your top priority, so you have somewhere to go immediately on announcing your decision, otherwise he will try to win you back - again.

[Darius]

Ammon, I know you want honesty in responses, so I have to say it appears to me that you guys are very poor at honest, open communication. Add to that poor listening skills on at least his part.
Have you guys ever considered couples counseling? Since neither one of you seems to be willing to talk about things in a mature way, a third party might be able to produce it in you.

[Ammon]

I've tried so many times to communicate with him.
Asked him many times to go to couple counceling, his responses are always the same "let it be, I heard enough out of you" or my personal favorite "you need professional help, and a lot would be solved"

So yeah, I agree there's no comminication, but believe me it came so far that I always had to start by saying (nothing to get mad over but...)

But from what I've posted earlier I can understand that you think there's no commication because I don't want that anymore... Just like today he is being so talkative since he's got back home! And I'm being like a little annoying bitch in my responses I'm beginning to feel sorry because I'm not the type to be like this. I simply want this over soon.