How to help my friend!

[Anonymous]

Hello
I'm a girl and I'm 19 and I met this guy that goes to my art school a few weeks ago, he's 17. We've talking a lot for the past two weeks, even thought we've just met.
In the beginning I actually thought he might be interest in me because he flirts a lot, but two days ago we were talking about a friend of ours who's gay and I asked him if he had ever questioned his own sexuality; he said yes but that he doesn't know.
He seems very confused and I'd really like to do or say something to help him, but I don't want to pressure him.
I feel like I should be able to help him but I never went through what he's going through so I really don't know..

[Dark Angel]

Get him on here :3

[jamiebfd]

he will figure it out on his own just like everyone else.
all you can do is support him which ever way he turns out.
take him to a few different clubs. try a gay bar and a straight bar. see how he reacts but dont pressure him. try not too seem too interested in his sexuality because that could possibly make it harder for him to discover, feeling like he is being watched etc.
hope that helps a bit

[FieryJoker!!!]

I'd just be there for him, he will find his own legs in time, but until he does just be a good friend

You seem like a nice person if you've made such a big effort to help him.

[marshlander]

It's nice that you want to help, but I would agree with the others that this is a journey that we have to make for ourselves. Coming to terms with a minority sexuality can be very tough sometimes. Many people think that coming out is all about telling other people. They sometimes forget that we have to accept it ourselves first. For some people there is hell of a lot of crap to clear out of the way first before they can start to do that.

It sounds like he is lucky to have you as a friend. Be prepared that he will probably need some space and time to himself.

[Anonymous]

thank you so much everyone

[posterpicture]

You are such a great friend I wish I can find a friend like you someday.

Here is some resources that I hope they can help:

First, you should read about the stage of coming out to know more about how your friend's feeling:

Stages in Coming Out

Second, if he ever comes out to you, this link will help:

When a Friend Comes Out to You

One of the good advice is:

"Don’t be too serious. Sensitively worded humor may ease the tension you are both probably feeling. "

[Mike]

Hello
I'm a girl and I'm 19 and I met this guy that goes to my art school a few weeks ago, he's 17. We've talking a lot for the past two weeks, even thought we've just met.
In the beginning I actually thought he might be interest in me because he flirts a lot, but two days ago we were talking about a friend of ours who's gay and I asked him if he had ever questioned his own sexuality; he said yes but that he doesn't know.
He seems very confused and I'd really like to do or say something to help him, but I don't want to pressure him.
I feel like I should be able to help him but I never went through what he's going through so I really don't know..

WOW! You're SO sweet to want to help!
I wish I had met you, when I was going through the toughest time in my life - when I was 14-20.

Listen, I think you should get it out there - what you think about gay people. Let him know you support gays 100 percent and you think they should be given all the rights "straight" people have.
It'll make it easier for him to open up about his sexuality...

Sending you a hugggge hug!

[Anonymous]

aww, thank you everyone!
I've talked to him about relationships and he hasn't had any experiences so maybe when he starts dating and stuff he'll know for ~sure? well, he said he really liked a girl a few months ago but he's so shy, sometimes I'm afraid to ask him things.. I guess I'll just wait til he's confortable enough to talk

[Anonymous]

WOW! You're SO sweet to want to help!
I wish I had met you, when I was going through the toughest time in my life - when I was 14-20.

Listen, I think you should get it out there - what you think about gay people. Let him know you support gays 100 percent and you think they should be given all the rights "straight" people have.
It'll make it easier for him to open up about his sexuality...

Sending you a hugggge hug!

I'm disapointed with myself, I wish I could be a better friend.. I'm afraid I'll start liking him and let my feeling interfere with my friendship.. this whole story is really confusing but I really wanna do what's best for him.. He said I'm the only person he has ever talked about this..