okay first off, i am sorry to hear that, i lost my father at a very early age so i can relate, the best thing to do my young man is to keep your chin up. your grandfather would not want you to stop living, nor become a hermit and forget everything else in life. you have to remain strong and you will get through this, my father died in 2002 and since then it has been hard but i know he is watching over me, keeping me safe and always there when i need him, he wanted me to keep going with my life, purse the career i wanted and do all the things i want out of life and to never stop living. and that is exactly what you need to do, cherish your grandfathers last few days and do not look at this as a funeral or lose of life, but look at it once he has past as celebration of his life. you'll make it through dude and remember this "when life knocks us down for something it is us that has to pick ourselves up again and learn from what happened and move forward"
also this healing is not going to happen over night so just take time, and keep your chin up.
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I won't go through all the usual trite cliches of condolence. Emily Dickinson once metaphorically represented the mourning process "As freezing persons, recollect the snow / First-Chill-Then Stupor-Then the letting go-." The mourning process is difficult, the effects never really go away, it's rather something continuous, a process of being always in "the snow," with occasional moments of stupor and remembrance. In some sense that seems glum, but in another way I think its a testament to the persistence of our existence as long as there are people who remember us. I don't buy into any ideas of spiritual watching over, but people stay with you through your life as memories and influences.
I'm not sure that's much help though...
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"As freezing persons, recollect the snow / First-Chill-Then Stupor-Then the letting go-."The mourning process is difficult, the effects never really go away, it's rather something continuous, a process of being always in "the snow," with occasional moments of stupor and remembrance. In some sense that seems glum, but in another way I think its a testament to the persistence of our existence as long as there are people who remember us.
Seriously..this may be the best advice I have ever heard on the subject....very nicely phrased...
I am sorry about your grandfather dasbas.
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thank you guys, i just need maybe a few ideas on what to do with myself and my time i need to keep my head away from this anything that kept you guys going, through your own similar experiences would help alot thanks in advance to anyone with advice.
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My father had a stroke a few years back. I can remember how debilitating it was watching him slowly slip away as the days passed. It's a terrible moment to ever be thrust into. I was going to school and working at the time, so I put what little time I had in my studies. It kept me focused and out of the grim cycle of hopelessness one may easily get sucked into.
Whatever you're feeling is perfectly legit and reasonable. And there's nothing wrong with crying.
-victor e
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Losing someone is a part of being human, a terrible, hideous fact of our existence. I don't think that there is anything that can really remove the pain of separation, nor is it wise to offer glib condolences.
There can be beauty in the pain, though. There are things to learn from, things to remember. Remember all the good things that your grandfather has taught you, has done for you. Remember the happy times, because in the end, pain does lessen. The night passes, and the sun will rise as it always does.
In the mean time... Drink hot chocolate. Listen to classical music. Journal your feelings and thoughts. Allow yourself to feel happiness even when grief is washing over you.
And don't forget to smile, even if it's hard to do so.
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he passed today 12:10 it was bad we put him on morphine he slowely slipped away i cant believe this it hurts insanely, i am not ready to let go at all, i want him back so much.
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You've done an amazing job so far
