Open Relationship

[michaelson]

Is anyone in an open relationship with someone where both of you are truly happy with it?

[princealbertofb]

I'm afraid this group of users is rather atypical in that respect. There aren't many couple that I know who are in that sort of relationship on this site. Maybe East could tell you more?

My partner and I have given each other freedom over our bodies and what we do with them, taking into account that
1) we live in two separate countries most of the time, and
2) that we would be careful (safer sex precautions) if we were ever to stray in that way,
3) on the grounds that we don't own anyone and that it would be difficult to control someone else especially at a distance.

Anyway, our relationship is not about control but I think it is about trust. My partner has said that he's never felt so compelled to remain faithful as since he's been in a relationship with me, and I believe him, so again we are not very typical. He knows that I expect him to just be careful with his body (and then mine) if he should ever feel like trying something else out.

I'd like to know what sort of answers you are expecting? I sense that you are in a relationship where one of you is hesitant about giving the other partner freedom to roam... and there must be reasons for that, whether jealousy issues or uncertainty issues, curiosity issues or just different sex drive issues.

Fantasies can sometimes be played out and some couples manage to work out sex play together. It may take a little talking. The thing is not to feel pressured into opening the relationship. But as I was reminded yesterday from watching Bear City (a comedy film about the Bear community) open relationships are difficult to sustain, especially when one of the partners is uneasy about it, unsure of the quality of his relationship with his partner or sensing a breakup coming.

Can you expand on what seem to be your worries?