Issues with Harassment

[Devin]

I suppose anonymous posting is not truly necessary after all. I mainly chose it because I feared that people would call me a coward and/or weakling for not standing up for myself, but people have been a bit more generous than that...

To respond to some of the posts,
I'm afraid alternative housing is not an option at this time...Financially, that is.

I do agree with princealberts suggestion of counseling. Perhaps talking this out with someone face to face would help alleviate the sense of isolation I feel.

I will consider bringing this to the campus authorities, but I am not making any solid commitments to that effect as of yet...

[Ian]

I wear the same attire as my mates and speak in the obligatory deep gravelly male voice.

It sounds like what you are describing is speaking with glottal fry (a horrible speech problem which is taking our generation captive). You should remind yourself- YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO SPEAK WITH YOUR NATURAL VOICE!

Glottal fry is becoming sort of "in fashion" for youth. It sounds relaxed, it sounds macho, it sounds hip, BUT using excessive and deliberate glottal fry when speaking is the leading cause of VOCAL NODULES and VOICE STRAIN!!

Vocal nodules are piles of tissues, like a scab, that forms over the vocal chords when they rub together excessively. They do this whenever you glottalize a vowel while you are speaking. When you speak with glottal fry, which is that grainy sound you hear rock singers use, or really "chill" teenagers, or smokers, that is the sound of their vocal folds rubbing together. Vocal nodules may not be noticeable now, but they will be if they continue to grow, which is why smokers have raspier voices later on in life, they are hoarse and breathy. Which is not a full, attractive, voice! You want your voice to vibrate and be commanding if you want people to respect you! Mostly likely, you are giving your insecurity away if you are not allowing the vibration in your voice to reach your mask. Remember, rehabilitation for vocal nodes can mean vocal training, speech therapy, vocal rest (not speaking for extended periods of time), and even SURGERY!

Free your natural voice!

[KnightShade]

Keep in mind, Devin, that there are lots of books about "assertiveness" that are very helpful. Most people would be surprised to learn that assertiveness can solve a LOT of problems in their personal life.

And I would never call anyone who posts anonymously a coward. I would call them wise.

[Cardiganwearer]

I do agree with princealberts suggestion of counseling. Perhaps talking this out with someone face to face would help alleviate the sense of isolation I feel.

I will consider bringing this to the campus authorities, but I am not making any solid commitments to that effect as of yet...

What you need to appreciate is that what is going on is wrong, in an objective sense. It isn't a perverse view that you are taking of the situation.

While counselling may help you cope with the circumstances it is no substitute for taking action to stop those circumstances. What is happening to you is wrong and the campus authorities owe you a duty of care to prevent these things happening, they can't do this until you inform them about the situation.

You may not be the only victim of these people. By taking action you may be helping other people. If you substitute counselling for action you'll just be making yourself slightly more comfortable with a position which is not going to get better on it's own. Do both, I suspect any worthwhile counsellor would tell you to take action anyway, or take it on your behalf. Is there no student welfare service on campus?

Please understand I'm not criticising you for not having taken any action yet, nor am I crticising those who have suggested counselling.

[Devin]

What you need to appreciate is that what is going on is wrong, in an objective sense. It isn't a perverse view that you are taking of the situation.

While counselling may help you cope with the circumstances it is no substitute for taking action to stop those circumstances. What is happening to you is wrong and the campus authorities owe you a duty of care to prevent these things happening, they can't do this until you inform them about the situation.

You may not be the only victim of these people. By taking action you may be helping other people. If you substitute counselling for action you'll just be making yourself slightly more comfortable with a position which is not going to get better on it's own. Do both, I suspect any worthwhile counsellor would tell you to take action anyway, or take it on your behalf. Is there no student welfare service on campus?

Please understand I'm not criticising you for not having taken any action yet, nor am I crticising those who have suggested counselling.

I agree that counselling is no substitute for actual intervention, but quite frankly I am too afraid of the repercussions to step forward