Hello--please cancel ur ad: all those sites are worthless. I just realized I was paying $36 a month for match.com even though i never got a single response or email.
Grindr? useless, even for trying to hook up.
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I've tried two dating sites thus far: Adam4Adam and JustGuys and both weren't helpful at all. Every dude I've ever met in person because of those sites wanted nothing more than to get in my pants and ditch me right after. Definitely not what I'm into. I've had a few decent/fun conversations with guys on those sites. Unfortunately, by the third or fourth day of talking they'd lose patience because I hadn't yet mentioned/asked for sex.
Nowadays I only go to those sites if it's late at night and I'm bored with no one else to talk to, haha. I definitely wouldn't recommend using one of those two sites (or the others that have been mentioned, going by what's been said about them) to find a potential soulmate.
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I think if you are expecting to find the love of your life on a dating website you are going into it with unrealistic expectations, the only thing you can reasonably expect is to meet more people and maybe get laid.
Richard
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ardus Wrote:I think if you are expecting to find the love of your life on a dating website you are going into it with unrealistic expectations, the only thing you can reasonably expect is to meet more people and maybe get laid.
Richard
I can see why you might think that based on the look of them and some of the members attitudes, but I gotta disagree-
I'll be honest, the guy I've been with for five years now I met on Bearforest... looking at a civil partnership soon ^_^
on first glance it looks just like any other gay dating site, a lot of hook-ups and sex; interesting thing is it's aimed primarily at the US market but we got there.
So yeah I think it is possible to build something meaningful out of a dating site date, it all depends on your perspective and expectations.
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DeadByDawn Wrote:I've tried two dating sites thus far: Adam4Adam and JustGuys and both weren't helpful at all. Every dude I've ever met in person because of those sites wanted nothing more than to get in my pants and ditch me right after. Definitely not what I'm into. I've had a few decent/fun conversations with guys on those sites. Unfortunately, by the third or fourth day of talking they'd lose patience because I hadn't yet mentioned/asked for sex.
Nowadays I only go to those sites if it's late at night and I'm bored with no one else to talk to, haha. I definitely wouldn't recommend using one of those two sites (or the others that have been mentioned, going by what's been said about them) to find a potential soulmate.
I'm not trying to be facetious or anything, but.....those particular sites aren't really meant for dating/romance. Adam4adam is a hook-up site, plain and simple....if, you know, the sexually-laden ads didn't hint at that. Match, Chemistry, OkCupid are probably more up your alley.
Dating websites don't work for me......I can get dates on them once in a while (went on one the other day in fact) but they never amount to much. I wish I could meet guys the old fashioned way, but I only go to gay bars to be social with friends, not to get laid.....and gay-oriented social groups (like hiking club or social groups at the local LGBT center), while they're fun and everything, tend to attract guys that are either too young or too old for me. Where are my mid-twenty to mid-thirty peeps at? Oh right, NYC and Boston.
Oops, sorry about getting off on a tangent there.
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I think people really don't take sufficient interest in other areas of their lives when looking for a partner that is fit to be with you for any amount of time. Where do straight people meet their partners? Mostly, they meet them at work, at church, at weddings, among friends... etc. OK, gay men may be harder to come by in ordinary social settings, and there is the added difficulty of many of us not being out to friends and family (or else they'd be finding us people to hook us up with, right, gentlemen?). However, I think if you actually have a bit of a social life, belonging to a society or association, volunteering in a charity, going to a gym or to a dance club, you are more likely to find people that you would enjoy hanging out with and maybe making your parner one day.
Let those sites cater to those who want a quick hookup for sex, because that's what they are for. I'm not saying you won't meet your ideal partner out there and in that context, but basically it is like looking for a needle in a haystack.
Although gay sex is the sort of sex you would want when you are gay, it isn't actually the sex that will bind a couple lastingly, but all the other areas of life in which you spend some of your time. Belong to a book club, go and do some singing, or some acting... Go and help in a production or learn to make jewellery or pottery. Join a walking and hiking or mountaineering club. You are much more likely to find someone that is well assorted.
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Hmmm. Idk... I do think that people who are meant to merge can merge anywhere, even on the sites mentioned. In my case, I didn't even find those sites good for hookups or anything whatsoever.
The real issue is combining passion and friendship, lust and caring, all in the same partner. There was someone I liked a lot but all I wanted was to snuggle with him and sleep in his arms. There was another--hotter--one, whom I had great sex with in a motel; he couldn't get away fast enough when we were done.
The problem is not the dating sites but rather the psychological issues of gay men.
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I've been on a few of these sites, and I'm not exactly sure why I still bother. Most of the guys (as has already been said) simply want to sleep with you and then have nothing else to do with you. From my experience, the rest of the guys don't seem to want anything to do with you at all; if they talk at all, they don't seem to be able to hold any form of decent conversation.
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I forgot.
Although most people in Grindr are looking for one night stand, there are few guys who sincerely looking for relationship.
I know this because three of Grindr members have become my friends. But amusingly we become friends after all of us left Grindr. What makes it more funny is that all of us work in the same office building. Two work in the same floor with me (But different companies). Another one works in the upper floor.
One has found a boyfriend.
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you cant limit where you find love.
than again if things fail be sure to post your experiences at gayspeak.com
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