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Hinting at marriage?
#11
jamiebfd Wrote:My bf keeps mentioning marriage all the time.
Even refering to the possibility of us being married in the future and what it would be like.
Also keeps talking about us living together alot.
Is he hinting at me? does he want me to propose?

How do i let him down nicely because i really never want to marry anyone. ever.
Paper and rings dont prove nothing to me.
The vows made in marriage are how i already treat our relationship. I love him too much lol.

Is there a way to say no in a nice way. just in case he asks me?

I mean moving in i have no objections to at all. But marriage scares me tbh

I understand what you are feeling, I have a similar view on marriage. While I think marriage should be available for all, it's not something that that I personally would like to be bound by because basically it is a peice of paper that is full of obligation. The things that the peice of paper bind you too are things that should be everyday things. Saying and showing 'I love you' isn't exclusive to marriage, I don't need marriage to prove my love.

You need to talk to him about your views and feeling on marriage BEFORE he pops the question. 'NO' could be bad for a relationship, but having a talk about marriage and each others beliefs is something that should be done in any long term relationship, shouldn't it?
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#12
I prefere the diplomatic way ...:biggrin:
As my man said that we should marry I told him.... that I really like the Idea but that it is very complicated .... Where we should find mens to marry us ? We are both over 40... and then... how to explain this mens that we both meet so many times ....

I don´t know why ..but he never asked again
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#13
Jamie, just the fact that you and your partner are in a monogamous relationship speaks volumes. Good for you! There are many good posts about your situation. I too hinted around at my partner about 6 years ago concerning marriage which he wasn't for. He isn't against it for others, he told me he didn't want it for us. The subject was dropped and never brought up again. Other than a symbolic gesture, I guess there was nothing more to it than that for us. Of course I'm not too sure how gay marriage is legally recognize in the UK. Ours at the time would have been a non legal symbolic ceremony only.
As far as assets are concerned, we have living wills etc.
I'm sure your partner will accept your decision/opinion of marriage but why not wait until he brings up the subject? In the meantime when he throws hints you can give him your opinions but show him that you love him no matter what! Best to both of you!
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#14
pellaz Wrote:yes you can get married in a church. all the church does after the ceremony is fill out the paperwork and submit it to the county government.

skip the ceremony.

go to the self service counter at your county government and fill out the paper work your selves. there is no religion here. there are many rights that you will have as a couple by doing this. the law will treat you guys as a couple. because indeed you are one.

before he moves in tell him you want to wait 1-3 years before doing this. afirm you will tell him you love him every day. give him a simple platinum ring. make it work first, it is very very difficult.

Ah we don't have County Government in Britain, we have council registrar offices. I'm afraid it may not be that easy to get married in churches in England, please read the article below to find out why????????

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2011/nov/02...sfeed=true

Coffee
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