Do you close or open your eyes when you kiss?

[posterpicture]

When I kiss/make out with other people, I always close my eyes if I am totally into the kiss. When I open my eyes that mean I have something in my mind other than the person that I am kissing. The problem is sometimes when I open my eyes, I see the person that I kiss open his eyes too. That always turn me off and make me feel so insecure. Do you think that a kiss with opening eyes is unfaithful?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

I said in another thread that I view eye locking as a 'hostile' signal. That is largely because When I lock eyes with a person I am looking for 'tells'. Tells are the many thousand messages that we humans send to one another beyond merely talking. Tiny movements in the eyes are going to say a lot more than what a person says out of their mouth.

Since I do it, I expect others to be doing the same. My expectation is based solely on my personal experiences. I have discovered that most people do not know how to measure or detect the many 'tells' in the eyes.

I had a BF who didn't like me keeping my eyes closed while kissing. He felt that doing so was my 'hiding' myself from him (Well he was right to a point, give him that much credit). Truth was I didn't like what I saw in his eyes most times, so I tried to hide myself from what I saw. A mistake, he eventually lived up to his full, violent and abusive potential.

For some, being able to look in the eyes of their partner is their way to attempt to connect, to see if the person is enjoying whatever is going on. For others we tend to see too much, and focus on the 'negative' potentials, not the positive ones.

I suspect that your personal experiences have been such to where the negative eye contact has played a larger role in your life, thus you view 'eye contact' as 'bad'.

Ultimately there is no 'wrong' or 'right' answer to this. Do what you are comfortable with and try to think of the guy who does 'watch' you when kissing that he is enjoying your enjoyment.

[posterpicture]

You are certainly right to a point in this. Actually, I have this bad feeling about eye contact while kissing is because of bad experience. The last 2 guys I dated both open their eyes while kissing and they both treated me poorly. Since that I associate opening eye while kissing as a bad thing.

[LateBloomer]

I'm pretty sure my eyes are closed for anything close and intimate.

I mean, what are you supposed to focus on? Maybe it's my age, but my eyes can't pull that sort of focus.

It's gotten to the point where now I ask my partner to pull away for a second just so that I can appreciate their physical beauty. When I'm up close it's very sensual on a physical level but I can't appreciate them visually unless I pull away for a bigger "picture".

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Aye, the age of 40 when suddenly all the print in the world goes from large and readable to itty bitty.

[Genersis]

The locking of ones eyes can mean many things.

If someone DEMANDS you look into their eyes while kissing, I would guess they are trying to see the pleasure in your eyes, to confirm to themselves that the other NEEDS them.
This can be either to help them believe they are better than the other. Almost a form of asserting dominance.
Or it could be to higher their confidence in the relationship and self-esteem

Another possibility is that they get some sort of feeling of increased intimacy and trust from it. That if they don't get it, they don't feel as intimate with the other, damaging their self-esteem.

None of them are are too helpful for a relationship. The first especially. The rest not so much.
Oh, and of course, some people might just get turned on more by it or have a preference with no psychological factors.

I'm not trying to scare anyone into thinking kissing with your eyes open is a bad thing. Sorry if this post comes off that way.:redface:
I'm just pondering psychological reasons for such. Yes, i'm not a psychologist, it's just out of curiosity.mile:

[LateBloomer]

Aye, the age of 40 when suddenly all the print in the world goes from large and readable to itty bitty.

Ah, that's better.

[Kyle]

I always close my eyes when I kiss.
I have tried to open eyes sometimes and have seen my boyfriend with closed eyes and that looked cute but closed my eyes again and kept on kissing. I think kissing when both partners have eyes open is awkward and also I would feel insecure if I found out my partner has eyes open while kissing me. So close your eyes and focus on kiss that's how I think is better.

[TySlamma]

I typically close my eyes during a kiss with my significant other, I feel more engaged with the kiss then if I keep them open. Like the author stated if your eyes are open then you are thinking of something else or distracted by whats around you to be fully into the kiss, and then it loses its meaning.

[Rainbowmum]

I always close my eyes during a kiss with the husband.