Screaming at the fork in the road.

[azulai]

Hi, ViolettaAlexis. Welcome to GS! mile:

When you think of a relationship, what do you ideally want? Is your current relationship there or have the potential to get there? You mention a polyamorous relationship, so I'm curious if this is just for now or is this what you feel like you ultimately need?

What has happened in your past relationships with women? Did you go through something similar and then desire to be with men? I guess, I'm wondering if there is a pattern of behavior after being in a relationship for a while that you need to be aware of?

How did you and your current bf meet? Are you living together? I understand that you love him, but maybe your love for him has evolved more into a friendship-love?

I think you have soul searched and you seem very aware of yourself. It's difficult when the answers may hurt someone we love. Hang in there, you need to give yourself time to work though this and as James has said, you have to be true to yourself.

[Rainbowmum]

Hi ViolettaAlexis,

First ,welcome to GS.
I have to agree with most of what has been said already, by other members.
Sweetie, no one here can or will tell you what to do , the same as no one here will set judgment upon you.
We are here to listen and help.
It sounds to me like you need to do a fair bit of soul searching, only you know what makes you happy and content.
You have to be true to yourself,but not only that, you also have to love the person you are ,when you are true to yourself.( the reason I mention this is because you can not live a lie that pleases someone else, it just wont work .)

If you are in a relationship that you are not 100% commited to , it is not fair to either one of you, and some one will inevitability get hurt.

You will never be able to get the femininity you crave from a woman , from a man.
We are built different and I say ,vive la différence.
A man is a man warts and all , the same goes for a woman.

I am pretty sure that gay men are attracted to men, because they are men.( not imitation women)

One bit of advice I would like you to consider if you please,
Being bisexual does not give anyone the right to cheat on someone, or to have their cake and eat it when in an exclusive committed relationship, and it sounds to me that your relationship with him has developed into just that.

Sweetie , if you want to play the field , then play it ,but play fair and not with the heart of someone that has given that heart to you.

[LateBloomer]

That was lovely RBmum.

[zeon]

Herlo there,
By sounds of it you got stuck in the middle... I would recommend maybe listening to your heart over your mind... Your heart is longing for a woman and its not exactly fair on both of you if you keep this up... Of course your going to love him that emotion wont ever die... Everyone we have ever loved we always feel the love for them as love is a seed it grows it welts but it never dies... lf i was you and longing for same sex attraction as his ruled out girls in your life i would kindly let him go.... Explain to him your doing this not because you have fallen out of love because you cant love is a seed and doesnt die... Your doing this because its not fair on both of you... You for the bi sexuality wanting to go with both sexes and him for having to endure this... Of course tell him you would love to be great friends and possibly in the future once ya both explored options then your be happy to go get back together....

This is the reason i said to my boyfriend

Your my partner not my possession.. I dont own you control you i only trust you, however if ya go out one night and something happens just be honest with me and ill respect that but if i see evidence or footage of events and you havent told me..... May god help you!

Kinbdest regards

zeonb x