12-24-2011, 07:57 PM
I actually encountered this on many occasions over the years and I might be able to offer you some advice based on what information you have given...sometimes the advice will change if there are more details of course...
There are different kinds of love....and one thing is certain...It is easy to idealize someone when you are not in an intimate relationship with them. We all do it. They can become anyone you want them to be...they can act and react in accordance with your wishes...but these fantasies rarely translate into reality very well.
Sometimes friendship is more rewarding and there is a deeper intimacy than in alot of relationships....you may already have the best of him and not even know it!
Or...to sum it all up.....I used to tell my bar customers that they should not build a pedestal for me because when I fell off of it they were most likely going to get mad at me for not being who they wanted me to be...and that sucks :biggrin: To be fair...I told myself the same thing when I found myself building a pedestal for someone else.
There are different kinds of love....and one thing is certain...It is easy to idealize someone when you are not in an intimate relationship with them. We all do it. They can become anyone you want them to be...they can act and react in accordance with your wishes...but these fantasies rarely translate into reality very well.
Sometimes friendship is more rewarding and there is a deeper intimacy than in alot of relationships....you may already have the best of him and not even know it!
Or...to sum it all up.....I used to tell my bar customers that they should not build a pedestal for me because when I fell off of it they were most likely going to get mad at me for not being who they wanted me to be...and that sucks :biggrin: To be fair...I told myself the same thing when I found myself building a pedestal for someone else.