Kitchen Screwups

[pocket_pilgrim]

Half the fun is screwing up anyway, you don't learn anything by doing it right.

true. a whole night of vomiting, despite the fact that there was no alcohol involved, is definitely a night to remember :biggrin:

also, i've achieved the common "burned on the outside, raw on the inside" level for all sorts of poultry. i swear the guys who sell them are doing it on purpose! i don't know how, i don't know when... but there's something fishy (birdy) about that... :eek:

[wouldlikemuscle]

^^ I've think I've been poisoned by poultry before! Either that, or a very strong coincidence. Tis not a very nice experience, especially when the stomach cramps start setting in whilst at work and you know there's a 30 mile journey home awaiting.

[pocket_pilgrim]

^^ I've think I've been poisoned by poultry before! Either that, or a very strong coincidence. Tis not a very nice experience, especially when the stomach cramps start setting in whilst at work and you know there's a 30 mile journey home awaiting.

so you're with me on the conspiracy theory then? :biggrin:

and don't get me started on stomach cramps, one of my biggest phobias - being in a situation where a toilet is still out of reach after hours of searching. that - and clowns.

[Smurlos]

I've never screwed up any mildly extravaggant stuff I've attempted.
But I've burnt many a piece of toast, trays of chips and such.

Oh and once we made fudge... but we put too much vanilla extract in... and it came out like toffee! *shields his poor sensitive teeth that he bit into it with, thinking it was going to be soft* *shudder*

[marshlander]

I enjoy most of the food I cook, but eggs and me don't always see eye to eye. Why do poached eggs know exactly how long you need at the computer and cook more quickly? I'm accumulating a stack of egg poachers I've only been able to use once ...

I wish I could claim credit for this one, but I can't. Mistaking salt for sugar when stewing apples can have unexpected consequences.

[princealbertofb]

Eggs like to be watched, Marsh, just like beautiful women (or men). They are so vain.... * Sings Carly Simon song*

[malcs]

Im normaly quite good in the kitchen can bake quite good cakes and chelsea buns are speciality of mine, but I do have a problem handling raw meat exspecalty chickens they make me realy squemish. One christmass mum asked me to lift the turkey into the roasting tin as I dont like holding them i liffted it by the legs and the bloomin thing unfolded DOH

Made some bread when I was about 10 and got confused added about 6 ounces of salt insted of 6 tsp, thing is no one realised till they went to eat it!

[Smurlos]

Im normaly quite good in the kitchen can bake quite good cakes and chelsea buns are speciality of mine, but I do have a problem handling raw meat exspecalty chickens they make me realy squemish. One christmass mum asked me to lift the turkey into the roasting tin as I dont like holding them i liffted it by the legs and the bloomin thing unfolded DOH

Made some bread when I was about 10 and got confused added about 6 ounces of salt insted of 6 tsp, thing is no one realised till they went to eat it!

Similarly my mum did that but with sugar... and it came out like cake... not nice when you put butter on it and slices of chicken... haha.

[Solomon]

I'm quite a good cook really, but always trying to cut corners... you can't do hard boiled eggs in a microwave! Don't try it! BOOM!

[ardus]

Microwaves are evil in general

Richard