07-15-2016, 07:21 PM
[MENTION=20947]MikeW[/MENTION], [MENTION=18508]East[/MENTION], [MENTION=21957]Darius[/MENTION], thank you for your input.
That's the point. I don't understand. Because deep inside I know if we get back together, I'll be often wondering and questioning everything. Also, I know what my faults were, and the worst of them was expecting him to be exactly what I wished a bf to be - and sometimes requesting him to change. Eventually I started to accept him for how he is though. Afterall he dumped me because he couldn't handle the mistrust anymore, the mistrust that HE put into our relationship.
I wish it was that easy. I accepted many, many things from him which I thought I would never, including the fact he isn't trustworthy and flirted with other guys. I do love him, and even after all these things I don't agree with, even with everyone telling me to walk away, I always stayed and went through every single thing, even when I was hurting and doubtful. Still he was the one to walk out on me. He disrespected me in many ways. It leads me to think that he didn't really love me afterall.
So how could a relationship succeed if only one of the sides is actually trying?
He's immature, so am I. Still got lots to learn and perhaps the break up happened for that. Still wish I could find a way to make everything alright. I really thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him.
MikeW Wrote:[MENTION=18508]East[/MENTION] said, you need to try and understand what YOU put into this failed relationship. It always takes two to tangle. So, indeed, what's up with this desire to get back into wha you no KNOW will be a disappointing (and emotionally abusive) relationship?
That's the point. I don't understand. Because deep inside I know if we get back together, I'll be often wondering and questioning everything. Also, I know what my faults were, and the worst of them was expecting him to be exactly what I wished a bf to be - and sometimes requesting him to change. Eventually I started to accept him for how he is though. Afterall he dumped me because he couldn't handle the mistrust anymore, the mistrust that HE put into our relationship.
MikeW Wrote:Now... all of that said.... I want to ask you a question: If you really "love this guy" how come you can't ACCEPT him for what and who he is? .... Accept him and feel totally ok about the fact that he is not and probably never will a) be truthful and b) will always want sex outside your relationship? How can you say you LOVE someone and yet not fully accept who and what they are?
I wish it was that easy. I accepted many, many things from him which I thought I would never, including the fact he isn't trustworthy and flirted with other guys. I do love him, and even after all these things I don't agree with, even with everyone telling me to walk away, I always stayed and went through every single thing, even when I was hurting and doubtful. Still he was the one to walk out on me. He disrespected me in many ways. It leads me to think that he didn't really love me afterall.
So how could a relationship succeed if only one of the sides is actually trying?
He's immature, so am I. Still got lots to learn and perhaps the break up happened for that. Still wish I could find a way to make everything alright. I really thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him.
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