Changed my Mind

[Jason74]

Well like a week ago my mind was all set to go to San Fran Pride and set up my reservations at a hostel that I was going to stay at for like 3 days and I was getting all excited about checking out the bars and clubs and what not.

Now I have no interest in going and I think alot of that has to do with the fact that I am more at ease where I am at and I just don't have the desire now to drive 3 1/2 hours to hang around a bunch of other queers for the entire weekend, lol. Plus lately or the last 2 years I have enjoyed being in places where it hasn't been big cities. I think my initial feelings are the same once I get to a seasonal job that I have to go get out and about and get my gay on.

When in fact its really not the case and that I don't need to do anything. I mean why spend lots of money getting plastered and going to bar to bar. I mean what is the point of that? I mean I don't know anyone in SF and would just be going to these places alone anyway, what fun is that? So I have decided that I would rather just keep hiking and if I am really desperate to go to SF someday I will do it.

I just feel anxiety when I am in a big city and I have a feeling after the first day I will be like get me the hell out of this place. Yet years ago when I went to pride in chicago in 2006 I wasn't that way and happy exploring pride on my own and just getting out and about. Now life is different and I am not that big city wanting person. God I am sure all over the place.

WTF!!!!!!

[dfiant]

LOL @ years ago in 2006...Back in the olden days!!! LOL

Seriously, good on ya, no harm in changing your mind and doing what is right for you. I'm the same with big cities, but YEARS ago back in the 80s and 90s, I used to travel into the Cross (Kings Cross) and Darlinghurst (Sydney's eastern suburbs) on my own and party, but that was back in the olden days when people would look after each other on the club scene, none of this glassing shit because you accidently bump someone at the bar.

[pellaz]

grinder / scruff works.

[zeon]

i love going out alone..... u never know where u end up!

[monk]

i love going out alone..... u never know where u end up!

The mind boggles! :eek:

[Watermark]

In all honesty hiking sounds better for me also :biggrin:

[matty7]

What happenned this last week to go from been excited to go to not wanting to be there at all ?? is it just the anxiety of goin to a big city which i can see u dont like ? , i sometimes hate to put my name to go places but i force myself because i know i will enjoy myself once im there ? is that anything like your feeling right now ? its always your choice to go or not mate but im sure it will be great once your at the pride parade - let us know what u decide