Query from a Queer

[azulai]

I'm in a relationship with my first love. Whether it's going to be my only love or one true love, I think it's too soon to know at 15 months. I'm just grateful for what I have.

I agree with dfiant, it's unique and special for each of us, and you'll just know.

For me there was a certain recognition of heart that is unexplainable. My bf and I were immediately comfortable talking to each other as if we'd known the other for a long time. That's not to say it was a perfect meeting because it wasn't. My heart, mind and body all kind of pinged at once saying this is different and I wanted to know him. So, the initial ping kind of intensified and evolved as we dated.

We recognize that neither of us is perfect but that we somehow counterbalance each other. He does make me a better person. There's no meanness in him but an innate kindness. My love is interwoven with admiration and respect. I've grown from knowing/loving him. I'm a disciplined, driven person yet I have a very goofy side to me that he gets. He kind of sets me free. I don't have to be perfect.

I'll be honest, I wasn't the most willing to be “in love;” I'm kind of a cynic. But, I did have a moment where I felt a definite kick to my heart, and was oh-shit, this is serious. I can't see myself without him-kind of thing. He had his own moment when he knew of his feelings for me and it was much earlier in our relationship. So, we didn't "fall in love" at the same time.

I think for US, our love is a kind of raw honesty that allows the other to be himself but also to be better. I find love mind blowing and quite a bit humbling.