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12 year old son may be gay and I'm concerned
#21
It's great that you're asking questions and willing to come to a site like this for input. Your
son is very fortunate. I'm no expert and can only offer my own experience as one who showed
"gay" traits from early ages, so much so that when I was 4, my military father forbade me
from playing with baby dolls. I remain closeted to my family, but I still get advice from my
parents about clothing and jewelry that "looks gay."

Despite their best efforts, I am who I am. A lifetime of pretending to be who I'm not only
resulted in two disasterous marriages and children who grew up without me in the home.

That being said, your son's choice of friends and other "feminine" traits don't necessarily
mean he's gay. A lot of "manly" guys are gay (thank the gods) and a lot of guys in
traditionally female roles are straight. Discouraging your son from feminine activities
could very well make him think that the man who will always be the most important man
in his life (you) thinks he's gay and end up causing the very confusion you're seeking to
avoid.

Our society encourages sensitivity and gentleness in men and the culture of our young
people demands openness to other lifestyles. Parenting a boy is tough today and
my heart is with you and your son.

Butter
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#22
ConcernedParent Wrote:First of all for the record I am not gay the site just made me put what "specifically" I am but there was no option for straight. Secondly I have a fiance (a woman) and we're very much in love. Got it?

Now that's out of the way my son is 12 and he's been showing some"gay" traits. He'd rather spend time in the kitchen with his mother than watch the footy with me and I've noticed he has some very odd friends. Mainly his best friend, a ginger boy with glasses who is also very feminine. They spend almost every waking hour together, even in school. I've asked his head of year if they can split them up but all I got was strange look.

Not trying to offend you people but is there any way I can make sure my son grows up straight? I'd like grandchildren one day and I'd rather not have to have another child if possible.

You should be concerned about yourself. I find you rather obnoxious.
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#23
He's your son. You should love him if he's gay or straight. You should be there for him while he makes his decision. Also just because he may be gay there is nothing stopping him having children in the future. Lastly don't try to split him up from his friend friendships are important.
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#24
Don't worry about it, I found him help in the form of religion.

Already got an audio lesson booked for him after school tonight.
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#25
Help? He doesn't need help he need's love.
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#26
ConcernedParent Wrote:Don't worry about it, I found him help in the form of religion.

Already got an audio lesson booked for him after school tonight.

Isn't that exactly the opposite of what I told you to do O.O

Okay I might be wrong, maybe he is a bit of a troll. -_-
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#27
ConcernedParent Wrote:Don't worry about it, I found him help in the form of religion.

Already got an audio lesson booked for him after school tonight.

using religion to try and "cure" your son of being gay (or even just the potential of being gay) is wrong . using anything to do that is wrong . your son needs you to love him whatever his sexuality might be . by doing this , you're just telling him that you will only love him if he is what you want him to be , and being himself (should that happen to be gay) will mean he won't be deserving of your love.
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#28
I blame the ginger kid, a well known side-effect of proximity to gingers is homosexuality.
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#29
Troll failed.
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#30
ConcernedParent Wrote:First of all for the record I am not gay the site just made me put what "specifically" I am but there was no option for straight. Secondly I have a fiance (a woman) and we're very much in love. Got it?

Now that's out of the way my son is 12 and he's been showing some"gay" traits. He'd rather spend time in the kitchen with his mother than watch the footy with me and I've noticed he has some very odd friends. Mainly his best friend, a ginger boy with glasses who is also very feminine. They spend almost every waking hour together, even in school. I've asked his head of year if they can split them up but all I got was strange look.

Not trying to offend you people but is there any way I can make sure my son grows up straight? I'd like grandchildren one day and I'd rather not have to have another child if possible.

Chill, we aren't going to hit on you or infect you or something.

Best chefs in the world are men, straight men by the way. Looks mean nothing, trust me there are some pretty soft looking straight guys and some really rugged looking gay ones. Thea whole ginger thing is just a media storm, a bit like the idea that all gay me a effeminate and, if you are a slightly effeminate man you are gay. Good for them in not splitting them up.

How about worrying if he grows up healthy, happy and secure with whoever he is instead? Just hang around, read what many of us went trough with unaccepting parents then ask yourself "Do I really want to do that to my son?"
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